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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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lil_cig

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lil_cig
  • Town/Country : Philippines
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1132
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lil_cig's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my 18th birthday. Nobody said anything. Gillette sent me a free razor though. FML

#7336661 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (26328) - you deserved it (1898)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:57am - misc - by Lost (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I did a 'dine and dash' and left my phone in the restaurant. The owner answered my phone call. FML

#7321652 (276)

I agree, your life sucks (2654) - you deserved it (50748)

On 01/13/2010 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was working with the kid I babysit for. We were out and he complained that he was hungry. I spent my very last $2 on chicken nuggets for him and a coffee for myself. Just as I sat down, he knocked over my coffee, spilling it into his chicken nuggets. Then he cried for over an hour. FML

#7312861 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (20258) - you deserved it (1771)

On 01/13/2010 at 12:29am - kids - by bern5555 (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML

#7239048 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (20625) - you deserved it (7735)

On 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by dollybabe (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (5180) - you deserved it (39119)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to the ice cream shop after dinner. I am deathly allergic to nuts so I picked the vanilla. I take one bite and feel something crunchy, and see what I thought was an almond in the cup. I spit out the icecream in a panic. Good news? It wasn't an almond. Bad news? It was a cockroach. FML

#6665762 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (32996) - you deserved it (1401)

On 12/08/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was fired because I skipped a week of work without calling nor telling anyone. His secretary forgot to tell him about my scheduled days off for anticipation for my daughter's birth. My boss had already hired someone else so he gave me his secretary's job. Wrong time for a pay decrease. FML

#6663219 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (26186) - you deserved it (1463)

On 12/08/2009 at 10:30am - money - by solarecliptic (man) - United States (Virginia)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while driving, I witnessed the neighbors dog viciously shaking a black cat. So I slammed on the brakes and jumped out of the car, frantically chasing around the huge dog screaming "Help, someone please help!" I finally managed to tackle him and release the cat. It was a stuffed animal. FML

#6659884 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (7503) - you deserved it (18890)

On 12/08/2009 at 1:26am - animals - by damncat (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

#6528264 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (19986) - you deserved it (9449)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while looking through a stack of possible pictures for Facebook, I found one I really liked, until I noticed that I have recently developed a bald patch. Problem? I am a 22 year old woman. FML

#6408288 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (20781) - you deserved it (1769)

On 11/22/2009 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, a McDonald's employee had to correct my math after counting out $2.37 in change. I'm in AP Calculus and am currently learning how to find the derivative of an inverse of a logarithm. FML

#6377275 (296)

I agree, your life sucks (5239) - you deserved it (26758)

On 11/20/2009 at 2:26am - misc - by Links (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I have to go to the dentist to get a tooth capped. Why? Because my room mate knows I sleepwalk and thought it would be funny to put a trip wire across the top of the stairs. It worked. FML

#6359695 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (21342) - you deserved it (1303)

On 11/18/2009 at 8:30pm - health - by CB (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I took the bus to work. I was exhausted and had a big mug of coffee. Half asleep and thinking I was in my car, I reached forward to put it in the "cup holder" during the ride. When I let go, I poured hot coffee not only all over myself, but also on the large, angry-looking man next to me. FML

#6340029 (38)

I agree, your life sucks (5408) - you deserved it (16030)

On 11/17/2009 at 10:32am - misc - by Spiller (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I started my first day as a security guard. After spending three years and $30,000 to become a commercial pilot, only to be told on my yearly medical that I suddenly have type 1 diabetes, and will never fly again. FML

#6334903 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (27881) - you deserved it (1100)

On 11/16/2009 at 10:47pm - work - by Grounded (man) - Australia

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, some obnoxious guys started calling me ugly. I tried to ignore them and be the bigger person. That's pretty hard to do when they start throwing rocks at you. FML

#6324167 (166)

I agree, your life sucks (32229) - you deserved it (2076)

On 11/16/2009 at 6:39am - kids - by x0SoReckless0x (woman) - United States (New York)