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lighter123

Offline (the 07/21/2015 at 3:27am) | Search for a member

lighter123

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1870
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lighter123's page activity

Visits<b>companion</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 2:42am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 2:35am<b>SlapAndTickle</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 8:47pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 3:33am<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 9:16am<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 9:33am<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 1:08pm<b>yourmurderscenex</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:17pm<b>AllegroRubato</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 7:50pm

lighter123's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of lighter123's badges

lighter123's favorite FMLs

Today, after hours of waiting in line, I finally met my favorite band. After posing for a picture, I looked at my phone to find that instead of taking a picture with me and the band, my friend took selfies. FML

Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML

#21444253
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22904) - you deserved it (3259)

On 07/19/2015 at 11:02pm - health - by Bleach dat Blood (woman) -

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML

Today, while walking alone through a sketchy neighbourhood after a party, I learned that I look too broke to even rob and "not worth the bother". Overhead from a guy waiting for me in a bush with a flashlight and his equally charming friend. FML

Today, I came home after doing some Black Friday shopping for Christmas presents. I told my husband I got the must-have toy our daughter has been dying for. As soon as I said it, I heard squealing and turned around to see her standing right behind me. There goes the surprise. FML

#21307526
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29167) - you deserved it (11933)

On 11/28/2014 at 1:07pm - kids - by Ruinedchristmas (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML

#21303913
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30926) - you deserved it (2295)

On 11/22/2014 at 1:37pm - kids - by uterurist (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

#21303901
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42492) - you deserved it (5211)

On 11/22/2014 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Kilkenny)

Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML

#21303819
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34773) - you deserved it (4203)

On 11/22/2014 at 10:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML

#21302690
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (3603)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:20am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my supervisor was watching a video of his son. I heard a voice in the background and asked if it was Elmo. It was his wife. FML

#21302177
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30767) - you deserved it (5060)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:56pm - work - by bookworm - United States (Texas)

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

#21245913
78 comments

Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML

#21245833
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35690) - you deserved it (6026)

On 08/26/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by alanh69 (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boss asked me if I could work this weekend, doing the work of 2 people, for almost no extra pay. I had a weekend out with my kids planned, so I said I couldn't. My boss called it a shitty excuse, yet gave a free pass to a guy who claimed he had a "phobia of working on weekends". FML

#21245803
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36816) - you deserved it (2222)

On 08/26/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

#21245733
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43551) - you deserved it (4072)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend sent me pictures of him and his family on their trip in Florida. He accidentally included a picture of a girl sleeping in his bed, naked. FML

#21242918
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51254) - you deserved it (3689)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:02am - love - by lolatmylife - United States



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