lifa

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Offline (the 01/16/2015 at 1:00pm)

lifa

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 845
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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lifa's page activity

Visits<b>Rababco</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 11:55pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 9:45pm<b>APHPrussia</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 3:05pm<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 12:07am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 5:29am<b>Moklon</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:33pm<b>j_cat187</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 4:26am<b>Duladian</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 1:46am<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 8:50pm<b>Wyseguy4life</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:47pm<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:43pm<b>Toriahh</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:23pm<b>Paris25</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:12pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 11:29am<b>feeshcake</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:22am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:33pm<b>noah_1234</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 4:51am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 1:49am

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lifa's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

by void bowels() { cry(); } / 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm / United Kingdom (Caerphilly) / Transportation

Today, I attended an assembly regarding senior graduation. The assistant principal told us to look to the left and right of us, because those people would be our friends for the rest of our lives. I was the only one in the entire row. FML

by allergic_to_bull / 10/08/2014 at 2:48pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

by Jack00412 / 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I told someone about my degree in technical theatre with a concentration in lighting design. They looked at me and said, "You're paid $52,000 a year to turn lights on and off?" And technically, that's correct. FML

by ugh / 06/01/2014 at 6:15pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work

Today, I found out my son has a new hobby after seeing a picture on the internet: putting realistic-looking stickers of spiders at the bottom of my coffee mugs. My wife was scared half to death this morning after downing a cup of coffee and then glancing the cup's bottom. FML

by itwasathtebottomofmycoffeemug / 05/14/2014 at 4:58pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

by LeChameauTrisomique / 03/14/2014 at 12:33am / France (Centre) / Work

Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML

by blondie107 / 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as an introduction to the history of China, I asked my APA World History class to write a 500 word essay on a historical Chinese person. Out of a class of 18, five of them were about Mulan. FML

by desperate / 10/05/2012 at 5:47am / Malta / Work

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

by ohgodwhy / 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML

by haha / 09/03/2011 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids