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lickme89

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lickme89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 December 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 649
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lickme89 : as me

lickme89's page activity

Visits<b>hk</b> - the 08/08/2010 at 6:23am<b>laylie4</b> - the 08/07/2010 at 8:38pm<b>52fremont</b> - the 08/07/2010 at 12:22pm<b>FFML_314</b> - the 07/20/2010 at 6:06am

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Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

lickme89's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waitering at the restaurant that I work at when I collected a credit card bill that was worth $120 and a big zero on the tip line. Angered, I turned to a co-worker and said "I knew this asshole wasn't going to tip me." The guy was standing right behind me with $30 in his hand. FML

#833140
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18429) - you deserved it (148046)

On 04/06/2009 at 10:42am - money - by brhorton02 (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my best friend and I came home from Japan. Her boyfriend and I have been having an affair before I left so I decided not to tell him she was coming with me. We just got off the plane and got a bite to eat, he was waiting for me so he could propose, my best friend was standing next to me. FML

#786333
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15479) - you deserved it (197606)

On 04/03/2009 at 5:43pm - love - by C0olgirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

#527563
369 comments

I agree, your life sucks (171370) - you deserved it (30224)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML

#511174
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125607) - you deserved it (20314)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (210559) - you deserved it (35077)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mother finally had her beloved Siamese cat cremated. The cat has been dead for over a week and she has been keeping it on her bed, stroking its fur and saying, "She looks like she's sleeping" and "She's so cold." To top it all off, she's been calling me by the cat's name for three years. FML

#293616
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86770) - you deserved it (3587)

On 03/12/2009 at 10:20pm - animals - by LJ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, to remind myself to write a check for my speech and debate team (Lynbrook Speech and Debate), I wrote "LSD money" on the back of my hand. The Vice Principal saw it, dragged me to the office, and called my parents. FML

#204455
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47629) - you deserved it (13693)

On 03/04/2009 at 2:05am - money - by gonkc (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML

#5470
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41910) - you deserved it (340300)

On 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML

#1001
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49833) - you deserved it (6943)

On 01/12/2009 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Poopy - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML

#997
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29647) - you deserved it (7865)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by LiLGeek - United States (California)



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