Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lickastick

Online | Search for a member

lickastick

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 563
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lickastick : I enjoy traveling, eating, sleeping, adventuring, and watching Netflix... Sometimes all at the same time.

lickastick's page activity

Visits<b>Melayia</b> - 22 hours ago<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - 23 hours ago<b>jizzwold</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Cristian89</b> - 24 hours ago<b>KawaiiSushii</b> - yesterday at 12:45am<b>superwolf33</b> - yesterday at 12:11am<b>wowwzaa</b> - yesterday at 10:21pm<b>davered89</b> - yesterday at 9:48pm<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 8:17am<b>wazzup206</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 4:16pm<b>killthedead</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:26am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 11:35pm<b>umerin</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 6:05pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 7:13am<b>SteakfryOne</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 1:04am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 10:47pm<b>suckstosuckgirl</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 10:53pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:42am

Liked!<b>superwolf33</b> - yesterday at 6:11am

lickastick's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of lickastick's badges

lickastick's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56316) - you deserved it (6674)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44237) - you deserved it (32374) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

#20784458
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48701) - you deserved it (8098)

On 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I felt lousy and decided to give myself a pep-talk in the mirror. After a while, I cheered up and went about my day. I soon found out that my sister had recorded me through the crack of my door and posted the video on Facebook. I'm humiliated. FML

#20777975
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53347) - you deserved it (6247)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:40pm - misc - by Suomynona (man) - Germany (Hamburg)

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

#20777956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45159) - you deserved it (5899)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was chatting online with several relatives, discussing our family reunion. Bored out of my mind, I clicked to rename the conversation to "Boring shit with almost dead people." I didn't know it'd rename it for everyone. FML

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58543) - you deserved it (3812)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML

#20719275
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43257) - you deserved it (6603)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12948) - you deserved it (31995)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36805) - you deserved it (2409)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26763) - you deserved it (2915)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19578) - you deserved it (6370)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

#20049122
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16304) - you deserved it (8544)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while traveling with my cat, I had a mini-freakout when I realized that I left his favorite toy in the hotel room. I'm a 30-year-old man. FML

#20030776
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17272) - you deserved it (8418)

On 08/19/2012 at 10:19pm - animals - by speshlk37 (man) - United States

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML

#20000913
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16878) - you deserved it (1663)

On 08/03/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by yeah okay then (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: