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lich

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  • Number of visits : 7904
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lich's page activity

Visits<b>najraa</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:33am<b>ritz24683</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 4:25pm<b>SirGmoney</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:20am<b>Rayvinblade</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 2:58pm<b>notapotato</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 12:36pm<b>sodamnrandom</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 5:08am<b>MiguelVistro69</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 2:53pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 4:49pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 1:17pm<b>lizarddx0x0</b> - the 06/09/2009 at 6:21pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/09/2009 at 3:46pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 7:14pm<b>chubs</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 2:50am

lich's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lich's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59597) - you deserved it (7138)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

#4432884
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22051) - you deserved it (62349)

On 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Morrowindwhore (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I had a check-up with my dermatologist. When I took off my pants, she noticed a small mark on my penis and was concerned. I had to inform her that it was not in fact a mole, but a bruise from getting it stuck in a Snapple bottle two days prior to the check-up. FML

#3686221
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9221) - you deserved it (70989)

On 07/12/2009 at 3:07am - health - by Best-stuf-on-Earth (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML

#3610078
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11608) - you deserved it (51405)

On 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
818 comments

I agree, your life sucks (118778) - you deserved it (73831)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36039) - you deserved it (61284)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

#1942963
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30450) - you deserved it (42671)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
517 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53688) - you deserved it (310747)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML

#126669
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (121781) - you deserved it (22148)

On 02/24/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

#125156
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56641) - you deserved it (6769)

On 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by iliketurtles (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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