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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47761) - you deserved it (8177)
On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37383) - you deserved it (2631)
On 10/17/2010 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29555) - you deserved it (2097)
On 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm - misc - by disturbed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out what people really think about the beard I've been proudly growing for over a month. It appears that my face now looks like an unshaven ballsack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5904) - you deserved it (15626)
On 03/10/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by RyanM (man) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34156) - you deserved it (7049)
On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80751) - you deserved it (8452)
On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30924) - you deserved it (8326)
On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version
Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (19327)
On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I come home for lunch. I see a sandwich on the table with a note saying "I hope we can have a healthy new relationship, Love, Carissa." I see another note from my girlfriend next to it saying "I hope you enjoy your new relationship with Carissa." Carissa is my new step mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21804) - you deserved it (1493)
On 01/08/2010 at 10:45pm - misc - by SingleWorker (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went on a blind date that my best friend had set up for me. When I arrived, I introduced myself and we sat at the table. After we ordered our food, he asked the waiter for some crayons and a kid's menu, and colored for the half hour before our food came. He didn't talk to me at all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20352) - you deserved it (2473)
On 01/05/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in his bed. I was watching the Terminator on T.V. A commercial came on in the middle of the movie. We just started having sex when the movie came back on he said "I'll be back." in the Arnold Schwartzenegger accent and rolled over to watch the movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10651) - you deserved it (2551)
On 12/11/2009 at 4:26am - intimacy - by Tee (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, a friend convinced me that I should throw a big party and invite everyone to come. After fixing a ton of party food, I sat around and waited for my guests to arrive. No one did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24042) - you deserved it (2183)
On 11/21/2009 at 3:09pm - misc - by tealsoda (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4772) - you deserved it (49577)
On 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm - animals - by TheMichaelNixon - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I went to a family counseling session because my parents are getting a divorce. I told the counselor that I feel guilty because I feel like I caused it. She says that there is no way I could have caused it, that it's my parents' problem when my mom interrupts her to say "Yes she did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32306) - you deserved it (2258)
On 11/02/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by problemchild (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a 24-hour taco shop, while he was wearing a tee-shirt that says "F*** Me I'm Famous." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23168) - you deserved it (6680)
On 10/31/2009 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
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