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lhazz11

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lhazz11
  • Town/Country : 'Merica!
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 August 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1188
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About lhazz11 : Snowboarder, soccer player, track runner, eater of all the things.

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lhazz11's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML

#19443098
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25247) - you deserved it (4749)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - misc - by uhhh what? - United States (Washington)

Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML

Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20675) - you deserved it (7158)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned that my roommate doesn't actually know a damn thing about cooking. I'm suffering the effects of him telling me that chicken is best eaten medium-rare. FML

#19404145
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16498) - you deserved it (10103)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:02pm - health - by Ralph - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML

#19352692
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16317) - you deserved it (2934)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States

Today, in health class we were watching a documentary about anxiety. My teacher asked if any of us often feel anxious. I was too anxious to raise my hand, and went into a minor panic attack. FML

#19332021
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23169) - you deserved it (3911)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:23am - health - by cjd - Canada (Quebec)

Today, since I was grounded, I tried to sneak out of my room to attend a party by climbing out the second-storey window and down the tree. I was unharmed, but I probably should have checked to see if my dad was in the garden before climbing down. FML

#19312594
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6073) - you deserved it (41337)

On 03/20/2012 at 5:47am - misc - by treehugger - Singapore

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23287) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25988) - you deserved it (5669)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

#19245135
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8318) - you deserved it (27519)

On 03/09/2012 at 11:55am - misc - by h4rdy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (7492)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26887) - you deserved it (8841)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

#19158359
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26935) - you deserved it (2114)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:33am - misc - by BadGuyLuck (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I dolled myself up and hit the campus gym, hoping to leave with a cute boy's number. I left in a stretcher. FML

#19155355
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9655) - you deserved it (25812)

On 02/24/2012 at 6:01pm - health - by gabby - United States (Texas)



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