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lhazz11

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lhazz11

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2000
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About lhazz11 : Snowboarder, soccer player, track runner, eater of all the things.

lhazz11's page activity

Visits<b>Wrex</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 11:30am<b>nalalizzy</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 4:04pm<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 10:29pm<b>BeccaBoo2010</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 7:27pm<b>Monster27</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 8:26pm<b>JocelynKaulitz</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 5:02pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:27pm<b>dEnVeRkUsH</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:55am<b>maigan332</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Rosstapher</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 10:27am<b>badnelly123</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 10:22pm<b>sillym</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 5:52pm<b>ethan00</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 11:01am<b>Mornai</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 12:06am<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 11:07pm<b>tarv</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 8:47pm<b>Grabes4987</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 7:56pm<b>AGhost5445</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 3:37am

lhazz11's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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lhazz11's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67130) - you deserved it (8848)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53380) - you deserved it (8503)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47518) - you deserved it (6938)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was on a bus and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. According to a few other passengers, I nestled into the chest of the guy next to me, and hit him every time he made a noise. FML

#20795078
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41635) - you deserved it (9007)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by accountnamevalid (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44237) - you deserved it (32372) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58544) - you deserved it (3812)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML

#20733830
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55597) - you deserved it (5262)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:48pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

#20724353
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39835) - you deserved it (25072)

On 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50736) - you deserved it (3465)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I had a customer tell me how much she regretted not aborting her expected child, how much she hates the father, and described to me in immense detail what it is like to pee while pregnant. All within the 30 seconds it took me to serve her. FML

#20684874
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42677) - you deserved it (2905)

On 05/25/2013 at 1:09am - work - by mmmretail (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I smoked weed with friends. Stoned, I put on my sister's high heels instead of my Vans and I walked to 7-11. FML

#20624531
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18966) - you deserved it (73268)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

#20583013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52434) - you deserved it (11861)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML

#20568440
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34340) - you deserved it (6295)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States



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