lhazz11

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lhazz11

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 August 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4873
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About lhazz11 : A bisexual track star who likes to eat and draw

lhazz11's page activity

Visits<b>balboa_2</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 1:53pm<b>jelrid</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 8:32pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 7:54am<b>vtfan2319</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 12:43pm<b>DS0128</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 3:54pm<b>RodzillaX</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:24pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 5:02pm<b>killthedead</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:27am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 12:48pm<b>NerdyTherapist</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 4:56pm<b>whatcouldgowrong</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 3:07am<b>KitchenPig</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 2:37pm<b>pizzas_awesome</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:18am<b>Kaimanalyles</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 10:09pm<b>liquifiednate</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:56pm<b>ECHOSPiiKES</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:35pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:20pm<b>50_shades_of_idc</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:20pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:53pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 2:21am

lhazz11's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of lhazz11's badges

lhazz11's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

by lovehurts / 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

by NestHead / 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Animals

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

by Kit / 09/16/2013 at 7:09am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Love

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

by twatstick / 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Work

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 16-year-old brother managed to convince my 22-year-old boyfriend that I breastfeed my pet parrot. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2013 at 12:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 4:03am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally worked up the courage to write a girl a note, with my number on it, and the words: "You're stunning. Get in touch sometime." Heart pounding, I saw her, got up, and passed her the note. Then I passed out at her feet. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 11:46am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

Today, I realized I'm getting my period pretty soon. How? I started crying and throwing plates because I thought we were out of sweet bread. FML

by FuckYouMotherNature / 08/07/2013 at 2:51am / United States (California) / Health