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lhazz11

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lhazz11

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2281
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About lhazz11 : Snowboarder, soccer player, track runner, eater of all the things.

lhazz11's page activity

Visits<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 5:07pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 11:30am<b>nalalizzy</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 4:04pm<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 10:29pm<b>BeccaBoo2010</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 7:27pm<b>Monster27</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 8:26pm<b>JocelynKaulitz</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 5:02pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:27pm<b>dEnVeRkUsH</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:55am<b>maigan332</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Rosstapher</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 10:27am<b>badnelly123</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 10:22pm<b>sillym</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 5:52pm<b>ethan00</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 11:01am<b>Mornai</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 12:06am<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 11:07pm<b>tarv</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 8:47pm<b>Grabes4987</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 7:56pm

lhazz11's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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lhazz11's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45117) - you deserved it (4772)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48409) - you deserved it (5522)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21606) - you deserved it (81427)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42310) - you deserved it (5387)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42128) - you deserved it (5370)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

#20847854
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42569) - you deserved it (2981)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
189 comments

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48085) - you deserved it (17154)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 16-year-old brother managed to convince my 22-year-old boyfriend that I breastfeed my pet parrot. FML

#20835369
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48460) - you deserved it (4917)

On 08/13/2013 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48863) - you deserved it (4329)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to write a girl a note, with my number on it, and the words: "You're stunning. Get in touch sometime." Heart pounding, I saw her, got up, and passed her the note. Then I passed out at her feet. FML

#20825416
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53389) - you deserved it (7006)

On 08/07/2013 at 11:46am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I realized I'm getting my period pretty soon. How? I started crying and throwing plates because I thought we were out of sweet bread. FML

#20825062
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40503) - you deserved it (15777)

On 08/07/2013 at 2:51am - health - by FuckYouMotherNature - United States (California)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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