lexxiii

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Offline (the 01/01/2015 at 5:23am)

lexxiii

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10332
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About lexxiii : This site makes me happy because I like seeing other people in pain along with me. Always live life to the fullest, though. You never know when it will be gone.

I love kittens, science, and film all in that order.

lexxiii's page activity

Visits<b>oreo00</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 11:22pm<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 9:49pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 8:30pm<b>tentedjewel</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 6:02am<b>mlia_usually</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 12:03am<b>Idiedtwice</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 4:53pm<b>Silentshdw13</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 2:51pm<b>bagelbaron</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 2:46pm<b>lightningclicks</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 2:04pm<b>pengyvan</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 12:23am<b>JZAMORA777</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 1:48pm<b>punmessiah</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 8:03pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 1:32am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 4:30pm<b>xninix</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 4:16am<b>Red_Brooks</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:06pm<b>LieBull2732</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:13am

Fucked!<b>bagelbaron</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 8:46pm<b>xninix</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 10:16am<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:15pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:33pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:18pm

lexxiii's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of lexxiii's badges

lexxiii's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

by anonymous / 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm / Kids

Today, eating my weight in breadsticks at Olive Garden and trying to relive my childhood via a pogo stick was not a good combination. My new shoes are now a different color. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2011 at 8:20pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the bakery section of my local supermarket, I heard the beat of what I assumed was a song playing. I really got into it, and bobbed my head and danced a little. After getting some strange looks, I realized the "beat" was a machine mixing frosting. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 10:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2011 at 4:52am / India (Karnataka) / Kids

Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML

Today, I learned that if I don't clean out the litter box everyday, my cat will resort to shitting in the laundry basket. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 7:45pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, to punish me for being hungover, my roommate blasted the bagpipe version of "Amazing Grace" through his stereo. FML

by jm_track / 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to see my banker. As we were finishing everything up, I leaned forward to sign something. As I went back to sit down, my 2 year old pulled the chair out from under me, and I crashed down to the floor. FML

by Gretchen / 02/24/2011 at 8:56pm / Kids

Today, while at a work meeting, I finally summoned up the courage to share and express my opinions about unprofessionalism in the office. After the meeting, I went to clean up, only to notice in the bathroom mirror that I'd had a booger pasted across my forehead throughout the meeting. FML

by Eric Forrest / 02/24/2011 at 3:27am / United States (Utah) / Work

Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my mom changed the locks. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2011 at 4:18pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was walking to the shops when I saw my friend about 10 metres in front of me, waiting at the traffic lights, by herself. Jokingly, I shouted out "Who's that really ugly person waiting at the lights?" The girl turned around. It wasn't my friend. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2011 at 6:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML

by alephnull / 02/02/2011 at 4:07pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

by chelseaface / 01/21/2011 at 10:13am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, as I'm pregnant, my mom came over to do some nice things for me, such as clean my kitchen and cook a large pot of my favorite soup. When she left, I took a nap, planning to eat later. I woke up to find my roommates had trashed my kitchen and eaten all my soup. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2011 at 4:43am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous