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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13127
  • Number of comments : 828
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

lexiieeex3's page activity

Visits<b>NYM88</b> - 6 hours ago<b>mikethekid07</b> - the 10/24/2016 at 8:24am<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 10/24/2016 at 3:43am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 10/23/2016 at 11:01pm<b>sweetie808</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 5:17pm<b>bretzeller</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 4:07pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 3:16am<b>smeegle</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 7:09pm<b>nicolai44</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 1:55pm<b>marcelj121</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 12:51pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 10:42am<b>meli1195</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 9:22am<b>rengoonhoo</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 8:48am<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 7:48am<b>skyttlz</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 5:29am<b>vsinha</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 3:49am<b>Benmantha</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 3:30am<b>gamermonster</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 2:39am

Fucked!<b>marcelj121</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 6:51pm<b>rashadkhanracing</b> - the 10/18/2016 at 10:34am<b>MindGames</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 3:54pm<b>Talented73</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 3:13am<b>xxdlp3000xdd</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 6:36am<b>Arnoud</b> - the 09/21/2016 at 10:40pm<b>PopTarts513</b> - the 09/21/2016 at 5:49pm<b>DukeTyler</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 11:47pm<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 10:06pm<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 5:17am<b>vhsjulia</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 5:53am<b>CoolGuySoFly</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 12:28am<b>santoshbabu</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 4:52am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 4:32am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 1:35am<b>seenoevil818</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 11:44pm<b>energizerbunny23</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 3:32pm<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 5:53am

lexiieeex3's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lexiieeex3's badges

lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, after waking up, I walk into the kitchen to see my two-year-old with a blue sharpie in hand as he says, "Look mom, color!" He left no appliance or cabinet untouched in his coloring masterpiece, and I'm still trying to figure out where he got the sharpie from. FML

by xtinasky1 / 03/06/2014 at 11:24pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

by chinaski7628 / 02/15/2014 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a long poem that ended with, "Please don't get another mister / I regret I screwed your sister". FML

by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2013 at 11:53am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was at Walmart with my stepmom. We were about to check out when a little sweet-looking old woman came up and asked if she could get in front of us. Seeing as she only had two items in her hands we said yes. Her husband then came up with two carts full of stuff, condoms on top. FML

by sommmerrrr / 09/15/2013 at 12:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally accepted my grandma's friend request on Facebook. I commented on a family photo album she'd uploaded, joking that the quality would greatly improve once she added pictures of me. My comment was met with, "Shut up you sewage rat". FML

by sweetnan / 08/27/2013 at 9:29pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I could hear my daughter playing with her Barbie dolls in her room. "Do you think your boss will agree to give you a raise?", she said. "Of course, we slept together!" My daughter is six. FML

by Poly24 / 08/27/2013 at 6:32am / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "uh-huh," "not too bad," and "yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

by awkward / 07/26/2013 at 2:00pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

by vet1 / 07/11/2013 at 11:18am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work

Today, I went over my girlfriend of 3 months' house for the first time. As we walked through the door, I was greeted by a little girl whose first words to me were, "Are you my daddy?" FML

by walker / 07/06/2013 at 12:17am / United States / Love

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

by not cool / 06/28/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, after paying for my groceries, I noticed that a bread-roll hadn't been charged. I felt guilty and went back to the register to pay for it. The cashier burst into derisive laughter and mockingly asked me if I was "running for Pope or something". FML

by moosy0_o / 04/07/2013 at 3:22pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my fiancée and I showed my mother-in-law a picture of the location at which we'll be holding our wedding reception. It's a beautiful waterfront building overlooking the ocean. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Looks like a good place to commit suicide." FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2013 at 10:40am / Latvia / Miscellaneous