lexiieeex3

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lexiieeex3

377Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11768
  • Number of comments : 777
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

lexiieeex3's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - 3 hours ago<b>srinivasawesum</b> - 7 hours ago<b>draftskink</b> - 19 hours ago<b>nicolai44</b> - yesterday at 3:53am<b>derplogic</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 12:11pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 6:25pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 10:33pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 7:06pm<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 4:02pm<b>SweetMaria</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 4:00pm<b>papygeorges</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 7:42am<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 10:58pm<b>Weasel14</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 2:52pm<b>thatguy240</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 12:39pm<b>SunshineBoy</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 11:51am<b>jtorgey84</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 7:54am<b>ColorOfSoul</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 5:05am<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 11:44pm

Fucked!<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 3:44am<b>jogihoppa8343</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 8:00pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 12:13am<b>jamieblue6</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 11:44pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 11:15pm<b>Iz15</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 9:59am<b>IAmPotatoe</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 9:47pm<b>prodigy57271</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 7:21am<b>ADBurns</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 6:50am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 06/02/2016 at 12:41pm<b>USMC10Rex12451</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 6:04am<b>sandman676</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 4:53am<b>Roostermann25</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:42pm<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:40pm<b>newzealand</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:12pm<b>Tyrant166</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:08pm<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 8:46pm<b>6pointOhhh</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 4:09pm

lexiieeex3's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lexiieeex3's badges

lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

by dani / 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

by chocochoco / 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

by BondingTime / 03/17/2014 at 5:51am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, a lady who works for my husband confided in me that they've been sleeping with each other and now she's pregnant. She didn't know I was his wife. FML

by naesha / 03/16/2014 at 9:40pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

by emergencyroom / 03/15/2014 at 8:21am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, after waking up, I walk into the kitchen to see my two-year-old with a blue sharpie in hand as he says, "Look mom, color!" He left no appliance or cabinet untouched in his coloring masterpiece, and I'm still trying to figure out where he got the sharpie from. FML

by xtinasky1 / 03/06/2014 at 11:24pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

by chinaski7628 / 02/15/2014 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a long poem that ended with, "Please don't get another mister / I regret I screwed your sister". FML

by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2013 at 11:53am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was at Walmart with my stepmom. We were about to check out when a little sweet-looking old woman came up and asked if she could get in front of us. Seeing as she only had two items in her hands we said yes. Her husband then came up with two carts full of stuff, condoms on top. FML

by sommmerrrr / 09/15/2013 at 12:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally accepted my grandma's friend request on Facebook. I commented on a family photo album she'd uploaded, joking that the quality would greatly improve once she added pictures of me. My comment was met with, "Shut up you sewage rat". FML

by sweetnan / 08/27/2013 at 9:29pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I could hear my daughter playing with her Barbie dolls in her room. "Do you think your boss will agree to give you a raise?", she said. "Of course, we slept together!" My daughter is six. FML

by Poly24 / 08/27/2013 at 6:32am / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "uh-huh," "not too bad," and "yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

by awkward / 07/26/2013 at 2:00pm / United States (California) / Intimacy