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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6816
  • Number of comments : 414
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

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lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47131) - you deserved it (4040)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my idiot sister had to have her aged dog put down, then she posts on MY Facebook page, "RIP, Buddy, we'll miss you." My adult children and most of my friends thought I died. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44008) - you deserved it (4315)

On 05/19/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by SmittyJA24 - United States (Idaho)

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML


Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39705) - you deserved it (6530)

On 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by her mom raised her (man) - Mexico

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52040) - you deserved it (7209)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, my four year old son came into the restroom while I was applying my make-up, and asked me "Mommy, are you putting on make-up so that someone will love you?" FML

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43626) - you deserved it (3537)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom discovered a new way to get over her breakup: yodelling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39231) - you deserved it (3197)

On 05/03/2014 at 7:51pm - misc - by shylahrc - United States

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42722) - you deserved it (3549)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36894) - you deserved it (4716)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51861) - you deserved it (4537)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39561) - you deserved it (6999)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:48pm - health - by Nose bleed - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, in an attempt to potty train my step-son, my boyfriend and I put underwear on him, hoping that when he peed himself, he would realize using the potty is the way to go. Instead, he peed while sitting on the couch, got up, took off the underwear, and then switched seats. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37237) - you deserved it (12066)

On 04/07/2014 at 1:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after cleaning my house because I'd thrown a party all weekend while my parents were gone, I still got caught because somebody tried to make beer popsicles with Q-Tips in the ice trays in my freezer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20177) - you deserved it (38495)

On 04/06/2014 at 11:03pm - misc - by trp007 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

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  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

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