lexiieeex3

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lexiieeex3

386Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12049
  • Number of comments : 787
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

lexiieeex3's page activity

Visits<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 12:53am<b>jds14</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 1:26pm<b>frankenstine</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 11:44am<b>prinzess</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 6:32am<b>thepeniswrinkler</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 11:47pm<b>werepyre007</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 4:22am<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 7:41pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 5:01pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 2:39pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 9:32am<b>feven</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 8:28am<b>blahityblah</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 11:06pm<b>lambda</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 1:05am<b>Motocrosskid87</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:05pm<b>vaas90</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 3:47am<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 3:32am<b>alanvazquez1</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 8:27pm<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 7:09am

Fucked!<b>prinzess</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:32pm<b>werepyre007</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 10:22am<b>alanvazquez1</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:27am<b>kunal222</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 3:21am<b>ruler805</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 11:24pm<b>decoydualist</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 1:29pm<b>dtut</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 11:03am<b>thatguy240</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:17am<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 10:41am<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 3:44am<b>jogihoppa8343</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 8:00pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 12:13am<b>jamieblue6</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 11:44pm<b>Iz15</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 9:59am<b>IAmPotatoe</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 9:47pm<b>prodigy57271</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 7:21am<b>ADBurns</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 6:50am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 06/02/2016 at 12:41pm

lexiieeex3's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lexiieeex3's badges

lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

by Forge / 10/11/2014 at 10:43am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML

by queenmeme / 10/08/2014 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my sister told me about her upcoming trip to Mexico. I asked her how she was going to do anything without knowing any Spanish. She told me she's "just going to read their lips". FML

by epic174 / 10/07/2014 at 6:15pm / United States / Holidays

Today, my little sister decided the best way to cheat on a test is to take someone else's test, scratch through their name in pencil, and write her name underneath. She starts high school next semester. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2014 at 12:06pm / United States / Kids

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

by SaintGoobers / 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (New York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, while working as a teacher at a daycare, a two year-old girl decided the best way to share that she had pooped was to reach in her diaper and attempt to hand some to me. FML

by disgusted / 09/25/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, I went on a blind date. My date would respond to me by saying "retweet" and "favorite" when she thought something was relatable. FML

by clairebear104 / 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2014 at 1:52pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Kids

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love