About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs
Today, my little sister decided the best way to cheat on a test is to take someone else's test, scratch through their name in pencil, and write her name underneath. She starts high school next semester. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2014 at 12:06pm / United States / Kids
Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML
by SaintGoobers / 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by disgusted / 09/25/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Maine) / Kids
by clairebear104 / 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health
Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2014 at 1:52pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Kids
Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML
by Anonymous / 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm / United States (New York) / Love
by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love
by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals
by Amithatevil / 08/29/2014 at 8:35am / Japan (Kanagawa) / Kids
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Stellarum / 08/18/2014 at 11:13am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Kids