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lexiieeex3

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lexiieeex3
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1389
  • Number of comments : 212
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

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lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19522) - you deserved it (1540)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19522) - you deserved it (1540)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, my son got to my great grandfather's old stopwatch, which had been valued at a very high sum, and broke it by twisting the hands in reverse. He says he was trying to time travel. FML

#19990926
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19306) - you deserved it (2931)

On 07/29/2012 at 2:49pm - kids - by oink oink fuck off - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20510) - you deserved it (1552)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20510) - you deserved it (1552)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML

#19986009
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18086) - you deserved it (1679)

On 07/26/2012 at 8:46pm - misc - by Carrie G. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML

#19986009
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18086) - you deserved it (1679)

On 07/26/2012 at 8:46pm - misc - by Carrie G. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25480) - you deserved it (2866)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML

#19982859
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22775) - you deserved it (1489)

On 07/25/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by arw - United States

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10282) - you deserved it (37377)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

#19928485
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22684) - you deserved it (2189)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm - work - by Ian Artis - United States

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30682) - you deserved it (3891)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was walking home alone, a homeless man approached me and took me by the hand. Apparently, he's been watching me for weeks and has fallen madly in love with me. He told me not to worry, though; he's not a rapist. FML

#19918640
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27422) - you deserved it (1462)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

#19913171
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23659) - you deserved it (2490)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML

#19855807
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16007) - you deserved it (1587)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm - work - by NoMagicMike (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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