Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lexiieeex3

Offline (47 minutes ago) | Search for a member

lexiieeex3

40Liked!

lexiieeex3lexiieeex3
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5340
  • Number of comments : 376
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

lexiieeex3's page activity

Visits<b>byrne1095</b> - yesterday at 6:11am<b>lotr4</b> - yesterday at 10:36pm<b>DrummerWS</b> - yesterday at 8:00pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:02pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:22am<b>Rstein14</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 8:52pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:22am<b>BlackFire4890</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:49pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 1:26pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:56pm<b>NebulaNick</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 7:57pm<b>arasx0</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 12:26pm<b>kooljac702</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:51pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:29pm<b>blcksocks</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 10:20am<b>WarPanda</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:16am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 11:49pm

Liked!<b>BlackFire4890</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 5:19am<b>left285</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:58am<b>Lct1196</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 10:19am<b>burro012</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:40pm<b>standuqu</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 4:32am<b>Corey122726</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 12:31pm<b>joshtapp</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 3:03am<b>marleypuckpuck</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:19pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:51am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 4:38pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 10:18am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 2:28pm<b>thatwhitegirl12</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 8:54pm<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:13pm<b>bigbeefie</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 5:10pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 5:05pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 10:32pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 11:00am

lexiieeex3's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of lexiieeex3's badges

lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25998) - you deserved it (4228)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, for the 5th day in a row, I had to keep my 7-year-old home from school and search his poop because he "forgot" he's not supposed to swallow things like, in this case, a screw that fell off his scooter. FML

#17735426
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22948) - you deserved it (3619)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:43am - misc - by OopsMonkey - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15181) - you deserved it (31410)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, working as a nurse, I asked a 61-year-old patient if he did any physical activity. His reply was, "Well, I do masturbate a lot". He then went on to describe the various techniques he uses. FML

#17643019
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33203) - you deserved it (3882)

On 09/02/2011 at 8:47am - intimacy - by rochellamaya - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26311) - you deserved it (2905)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML

#17635834
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34029) - you deserved it (3759)

On 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent thirty minutes in the shower trying to remove "Pierre", a face complete with moustache that my girlfriend drew in sharpie on the tip of my cock. FML

#17628880
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27612) - you deserved it (10209)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31991) - you deserved it (4287)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML

#17406158
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28317) - you deserved it (3925)

On 08/08/2011 at 10:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#17390197
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36198) - you deserved it (3583)

On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44250) - you deserved it (2977)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by writing a breakup note with permanent marker on my newly painted bedroom wall. FML

#17355077
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36594) - you deserved it (2967)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:47pm - love - by thedancer5 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51344) - you deserved it (9860)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. His sister and I filled the air vents in his car with confetti so when he starts the car, it would blow all over him. In the process we lost the keys. The keys cost $200 to replace. Happy Birthday! FML

#17329385
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10958) - you deserved it (34390)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:44am - misc - by americanbln - United States

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26918) - you deserved it (4228)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: