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lexiieeex3

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lexiieeex3
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1387
  • Number of comments : 212
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

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lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML

#11980877
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25638) - you deserved it (7009)

On 07/19/2010 at 9:59am - kids - by Cody (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML

#9122302
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43542) - you deserved it (3918)

On 03/16/2010 at 12:50am - love - by ManInTrouble - United States (California)

Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML

#7309178
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25500) - you deserved it (4747)

On 01/12/2010 at 9:57pm - misc - by pass_the_tp (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML

#7273590
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27470) - you deserved it (9134)

On 01/11/2010 at 3:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
182 comments

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

#7261053
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30645) - you deserved it (2412)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States

Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML

#7239048
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23490) - you deserved it (8384)

On 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by dollybabe (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I found out that I have been declared dead by my credit card company in England because I haven't used it since I moved to Thailand last year. I will need three witnesses to convince them that I am actually alive. FML

#7167765
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22308) - you deserved it (1863)

On 01/05/2010 at 7:02pm - money - by Arsinoe (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, the elderly couple next door asked me to cut down a tree in their yard. It turns out they told me to cut down the wrong tree, and I cut down the tree they got married under. They now hate me and tell me they plan to sue me for damage to property. FML

#6897944
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27485) - you deserved it (3096)

On 12/23/2009 at 3:46am - work - by jordigs (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found a pair of glasses in my car. I don't wear glasses, and nobody besides myself has been in my car lately. It appears that someone has been sleeping in my car and forgot their glasses. FML

#6836153
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17905) - you deserved it (2160)

On 12/19/2009 at 9:40pm - misc - by chrono64 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at my work, I was ringing though a kid's purchase. I try to be friendly with the kids and when he handed me his cash I said "Thank you, sir!" in a playful manner. He then turns to his mom and says "Mom, why does everyone think I am a boy?". FML

#6291314
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23336) - you deserved it (4136)

On 11/13/2009 at 7:09pm - kids - by DeeElleGee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out who the father of my sister's 4 year old son is. My husband of 7 years. FML

#5928824
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54569) - you deserved it (2599)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:31pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)



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