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lexiieeex3

Offline (21 hours ago) | Search for a member

lexiieeex3

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2466
  • Number of comments : 283
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About lexiieeex3 : My life is a fantastic joke. Enjoy as I rant about it.

lexiieeex3's page activity

Visits<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:16pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 12:32am<b>vlader08</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 9:41am<b>pinkponypants</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 3:21am<b>A07</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 6:50am<b>huntingp111</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:58pm<b>rawr10203040</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:30pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 5:05pm<b>DoctorWatson</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:29pm<b>mathen</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:22am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:41am<b>MortenM</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 2:52am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 2:33am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:54am<b>danm19</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:28am<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:18am<b>16characters</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:35pm<b>EndlessBoredom</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:33pm

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lexiieeex3's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

#21152005
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45821) - you deserved it (5297)

On 05/26/2014 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47391) - you deserved it (7216)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46932) - you deserved it (4025)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my idiot sister had to have her aged dog put down, then she posts on MY Facebook page, "RIP, Buddy, we'll miss you." My adult children and most of my friends thought I died. FML

#21145745
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43797) - you deserved it (4304)

On 05/19/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by SmittyJA24 - United States (Idaho)

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
191 comments

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML

#21142903
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39105) - you deserved it (6446)

On 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by her mom raised her (man) - Mexico

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

#21137065
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51731) - you deserved it (7185)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, my four year old son came into the restroom while I was applying my make-up, and asked me "Mommy, are you putting on make-up so that someone will love you?" FML

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42485) - you deserved it (3451)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom discovered a new way to get over her breakup: yodelling. FML

#21129926
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38433) - you deserved it (3123)

On 05/03/2014 at 7:51pm - misc - by shylahrc - United States

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42446) - you deserved it (3535)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

#21119972
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36673) - you deserved it (4701)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50480) - you deserved it (4431)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML

#21114169
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39305) - you deserved it (6956)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:48pm - health - by Nose bleed - Canada (British Columbia)



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