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lex1459

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lex1459

296Fucked!

lex1459lex1459
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 April 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5595
  • Number of comments : 263
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About lex1459 : You like krabby patties, don't you squidward?

lex1459's page activity

Visits<b>japcrap</b> - 2 hours ago<b>arano</b> - 4 hours ago<b>_parth</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Caro97songs</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 9:54am<b>Soninuva</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:38am<b>carlyggibby</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 8:43pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:29pm<b>fightingkittens</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:56am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:20am<b>moo_mima_moo</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 4:39am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:54am<b>Kevinmeowbeanz</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 4:27am<b>dantee2005</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 12:08am<b>trailyss</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:12pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:34am<b>rgarz1</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:48pm<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 10:06am<b>jayemerald17</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:54pm

Fucked!<b>japcrap</b> - just now<b>_parth</b> - just now<b>Kevinmeowbeanz</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 10:28am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:23pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 12:43am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:23am<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:14am<b>hooAhhh</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 3:28am<b>tgranatire_12</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:42pm<b>Isak366</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 8:15am<b>Pinkgal123</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 5:49pm<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:00pm<b>terspal</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 11:45am<b>ddeveshh</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:42am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:41am<b>nomrana</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:34am<b>Eorlas</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 4:14pm<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:20pm

lex1459's FML badges

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lex1459's badges

lex1459's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding my bike back to my house. Suddenly I was hit by something in the head. I looked down to see a lemon on the ground and looked up to see a guy yelling at me in a car that was passing. He was yelling at me because I got in the way of the house he was throwing it at. FML

#6525806
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25171) - you deserved it (2782)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Lemonhead (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

#6433881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41421) - you deserved it (3203)

On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went to the school dentist for the yearly routine check. She took ages trying to clean out my teeth with the metal toothpick-thing, constantly hitting my gums. After half an hour of pain and spitting blood, she looks up and says, laughing: "Oh, I forgot to put my glasses on". FML

#5848105
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41740) - you deserved it (2342)

On 10/16/2009 at 3:27am - health - by dentistvictim (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number I wanted to mess with my girl a little. I started sending her provocative messages, and after 4 or 5 of them, I discovered I had entered her number wrong and was talking dirty to a man named Noah. FML

#5554431
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6996) - you deserved it (30112)

On 09/29/2009 at 8:48pm - intimacy - by pummy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

#5364487
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36938) - you deserved it (3350)

On 09/20/2009 at 1:01am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22614) - you deserved it (40093)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the laundromat doing my clothes when I noticed a cute guy next to me. I tried to be a ninja and sneak my sock into his basket so I could start a conversation with him. He saw me. FML

#4632889
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8914) - you deserved it (66157)

On 08/18/2009 at 4:52pm - misc - by Laundrylady (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

#4029321
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48126) - you deserved it (27218)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, a resident went missing at our nursing home. When I found him, a man in a blue shirt and red pants, he started yelling at me in confusion. I just thought it was his alzheimers. When I brought him to my administrator, I was told the missing resident was wearing a red shirt and blue pants. Wrong guy. FML

#3933300
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18031) - you deserved it (37518)

On 07/21/2009 at 4:22pm - health - by torkx3 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I proposed to a girl I'd been in love with for 6 years. I filled the balcony of the building where I'd first laid eyes on her with innumerable roses and, under the starlit sky, I did it. She later posted on facebook 'OMG. This geek I knew from high school did the FUNNIEST thing today'. FML

#3720470
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59626) - you deserved it (30989)

On 07/13/2009 at 4:16pm - love - by JackOLantern (man) - Satellite Provider

Today, I went to a yard sale and found a cute plush duck. I sent a pic of it to my friend with the message "Jackpot!" I guess she didn't see the pic because she called me up all excited, thinking my boyfriend of 6 years finally proposed to me. "No, I said, I just found a big duck for $1." FML

#3205255
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40215) - you deserved it (6682)

On 06/25/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by smallmediumatlrg (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss in my police dept. told me to start enforcing the "no bikes on sidewalks" law which we usually ignore. I pulled up behind the first person I saw riding a bike on a sidewalk and flashed my lights. It turned out to be a boy with down syndrome who was so upset he cried and peed. FML

#1873623
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73310) - you deserved it (13806)

On 05/12/2009 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking on the track when this really cute guy shows up. I was hot and sweaty, and wanted to impress him by pouring water on myself. Instead of being turned on, all he saw was me wiping my face on my shirt screaming. It wasn't water, I forgot I had brought Sprite. FML

#1686217
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10766) - you deserved it (96152)

On 05/06/2009 at 7:36am - love - by gymbob (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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