Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 12/26/2013 at 12:43pm) | Search for a member
About lennelleong : 30+ y/o passionate Musician & Retail Maven to pay the bills (yes - we Asians tend to look younger that's why I'm revealing my age). I'm rarely laughing so i'm here and on 9gag to get my mature kicks where due. It was either politics or law. I'm an Aspie, so I thought studying Law would be less taxing on everyone I meet. I speak English, Singlish, Mandarin & Cantonese. If you'd like to practise your Singlish in the meager dedicated free time I have, we can do that over Wechat, presupposing I like your profile/ emails. :D
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Today, I asked my dermatologist why my acne has been getting worse, despite following her directions and spending hundreds of dollars on medicine. She just shrugged and told me they can't actually cure my acne. However, they can prescribe me a bunch of stuff and hope one works. FML
Today, my dad went snooping on my laptop, and saw that I'd recently looked up 2 Girls, 1 Cup. It was out of morbid curiosity, but he thinks I'm into "satanic porn", and confiscated every electronic device I own. Now I have to sneak to the library just to check my emails. FML
Today, the communications expert I'm forced to work with added the line "as they can catch bigger fishes" to a film script. She does not believe me when I tell her that the plural of fish is "fish." This idiot not only has the final word, she makes twice what I do. FML
Today, a client refused to pay after I mowed her lawn. Her reasoning? I had entered her basement "without permission." I require on-site equipment be provided, and she kept her mower in her basement. I only knew it was in the basement because she'd showed me, and told me where the key was. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML
Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML
Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML
Tuesday 22 July 2014