About lenamartinovic : Castle, Criminal Minds, The Vampire Diaries, Pretty Little Liars. The Hunger Games, Harry Potter
STRAIGHT EXCEPT 4 STANA
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Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10582) - you deserved it (35220)
On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14644) - you deserved it (4186)
On 03/08/2012 at 2:13am - misc - by thatchick3333 - United States (California)
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14644) - you deserved it (4186)
On 03/08/2012 at 2:13am - misc - by thatchick3333 - United States (California)
Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6555) - you deserved it (35736)
On 03/04/2012 at 7:27pm - money - by stuff2710 - United States (Illinois)
Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23945) - you deserved it (3316)
On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23034) - you deserved it (6919)
On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)
Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12835) - you deserved it (24594)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33897) - you deserved it (1911)
On 02/02/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by aliezzedine (man) - Lebanon
Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother in law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (2515)
On 01/30/2012 at 12:24am - kids - by myself - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a man crashed into my car. He then got out of his car, dug a toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, and tried to brush away the damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22116) - you deserved it (1407)
On 01/19/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by toothpaste (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I flew to Dubai, en route to my new job in Afghanistan. Both of my bags were lost, my debit card was frozen in London, the next flight was cancelled, and I can't get a hotel room. I'm in the richest city in world with no money and no room. Happy New Year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28032) - you deserved it (1860)
On 12/31/2011 at 5:36pm - money - by EdwinOEF (man) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Today, I woke up at midnight crying, stood up to turn on the lights and face-planted into my wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16739) - you deserved it (3162)
On 12/29/2011 at 7:01am - health - by Girl-of-very-little-brain (woman) - Canada
Today, I heard my alarm go off, dragged myself out of bed, had breakfast and got ready for work. As I was heading out the door I checked the time again. It was 1:41 AM. Apparently my alarm never actually went off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25126) - you deserved it (4001)
On 12/15/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by 2285morgan - United States
Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27763) - you deserved it (407)
On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27761) - you deserved it (4475)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)
Friday 24 May 2013
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