About lenamartinovic : My dog ate my homework.
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lenamartinovic's favorite FMLs
by TiredMum / 10/16/2013 at 9:33am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML
by Anonymous / 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm / United States (South Dakota) / Health
by NoNotCats =^._.^= / 09/03/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by KatVanGogh / 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML
by DrtySnchez / 08/18/2013 at 5:37am / United States (Georgia) / Kids
Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML
by why / 08/17/2013 at 10:18am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
by Rachel8896 / 08/15/2013 at 7:28am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML
by whyeventry? / 08/02/2013 at 12:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
Today, I was in the shower, oblivious to the outside world, when four police officers who had apparently been banging at my door, entered by force. They were doing a bust on a weed farm and got the wrong house. FML
by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML
by kiwichick4life / 07/30/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous