About lemonypower : Hi
My name is Lemons
I love chocolate ,sports, reading.
I'm pretty average, but i want to be a doctor :0
I'm not a huge grammar nazi, because my punctuation etc. sucks. I only don't like it when people type lik dis, because really? Okay, feel free to private message me :).
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33953) - you deserved it (1576)
On 01/12/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26979) - you deserved it (2082)
On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (62258) - you deserved it (20225)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (199741) - you deserved it (58904)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (462306) - you deserved it (574261)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (353952) - you deserved it (66718)
On 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32963) - you deserved it (383434)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47136) - you deserved it (11846)
On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was at work. I work at a grocery store and a woman pulls a cart to me filled with chips, breads, lunch meats, and sodas. I said to her "Looks like you are going to have a fun party" she then looks at me and says "My mother just died, this is for after the funeral. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30762) - you deserved it (7949)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:37am - misc - by KMKWEEN (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, a guy sitting next to me in class asked me for a pen. I accidentally handed him a tampon instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18944) - you deserved it (5557)
On 01/29/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by iFail - United States (California)
Today, thinking I was being very generous, I lent my jacket to my new co-worker. I guess I should have checked my pockets before I did, I’m not sure that leaving 3 different flavors of condoms in them made a good impression. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15056) - you deserved it (27633)
On 11/12/2008 at 12:25am - work - by Lio - Sent from mobile version
Today, it appears that my girlfriend visited an internet web page called "How to confess to having an affair." FML
I agree, your life sucks (62983) - you deserved it (3745)
On 10/27/2008 at 5:08am - love - by damnit - United States (Texas)
Friday 24 May 2013
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