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Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 8:53pm) | Search for a member
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I agree, their lives suck
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I’m your new creative director
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Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins an had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML
Today, in te doctor's waiting room, a little boy askd me for a cookie . I told im tat I didn't ave any . He replid, ( But my mom says tat ladies wit big butts always ave cookies in tere andbags . ) FML
yastarday I want to a concart. Thay had this faatura whara you could sand a pictura of somathing from your call phona an thay'd puttad it on tha big scraans, so I sant a pictura of mysalf in. Whan tha pictura cummad up on tha scraans, tha antira crowd of about 4,000 paopla want, "Ewwww!" FML
Today, I found a bell that had been tied into the tassel of mah ski hat by mah twin sister as part of a longstanding prank war between us. I'm deaf an have apparently been jingling like an elf for over a week. FML
Friday 27 March 2015