leekoon

Search for a member

Offline (the 04/25/2016 at 6:05am)

leekoon

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 630
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

leekoon's page activity

Visits<b>Damned_Architect</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:40am<b>Vitrolicz</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 5:02pm<b>skyttlz</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 2:56am

leekoon's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of leekoon's badges

leekoon's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2015 at 9:31am / United States / Work

Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML

by itwaswarm / 09/25/2015 at 5:04pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML

by its still broken / 06/10/2015 at 8:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, after recently getting my car fully serviced and fixed, the horn has decided to spontaneously beep. To stop the beeping I have to press the horn hard, making it look like I'm purposely doing it to piss people off. FML

Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML

by Li / 03/23/2015 at 9:04pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

by Mr_snuggels / 12/24/2014 at 3:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm / United States / Kids

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

by SaintGoobers / 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (New York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

by FANZZY / 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my tits. He ignored it and instead sent a picture of his dog "looking blazed". FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2014 at 5:46am / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

by wendtinmypants / 05/31/2014 at 11:05am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, at work I had to explain to a client that male dogs can wear red collars and it doesn't make them "gay". The client then got angry and stormed out of the store, causing me to get written up. FML

by Holyguacamoly / 05/27/2014 at 7:15am / Iceland / Animals