About leahb99 : music ho
infp, taurus, 16
I actually wear glasses nearly 24/7 so it's funny how in 2/3 of my pictures I don't have glasses on
About leahb99 : music ho
leahb99's FML badges
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
leahb99's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy
by KristaAaronn / 08/27/2014 at 8:24am / United States (Tennessee) / Health
by BagelTheOtaku / 08/20/2014 at 1:15am / United States (Georgia) / Health
by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML
by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML
by jackie89 / 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Intimacy
by anonyme / 07/30/2014 at 2:51am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML
by Face fucking palm / 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm / United States / Work
Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML
by fuckmyjob / 06/19/2014 at 4:10pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML
Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML
by AndrewKeane / 06/09/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 1:06am / United States (California) / Kids
by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…