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laynepuls

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laynepuls

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  • Number of visits : 540
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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laynepuls's page activity

Visits<b>CountRyan</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 7:04pm<b>Serythvalker</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 4:11am

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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laynepuls's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit and she screamed "Don't touch me there!". Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML

#3782569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45241) - you deserved it (6528)

On 07/15/2009 at 7:22pm - kids - by shway (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my Swedish friend for some lines to impress this swedish girl I met at an expat party he took me to. I practised them all evening before I met her. I told her my feelings, and she scowled. Apparently I had wished the devil upon her - after asking if i could ejaculate on her face. FML

#2964628
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48883) - you deserved it (20778)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:57am - intimacy - by Dirtyswede (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83827) - you deserved it (221935)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML

#2295349
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15933) - you deserved it (58345)

On 05/25/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by silvercity09 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729
730 comments

I agree, your life sucks (273163) - you deserved it (145042)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

#2039933
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15450) - you deserved it (51759)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by nothing (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

#1942963
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30695) - you deserved it (42898)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

#1033363
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35832) - you deserved it (307937)

On 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by tvaladie (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I quietly managed to get my clothes back on and get out the door without waking her. I made it all the way out of her building and to my car before I realized I had forgotten my keys. FML

#911522
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13616) - you deserved it (102889)

On 04/11/2009 at 3:38am - intimacy - by Smooth (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
680 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33279) - you deserved it (481464)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had my car stolen. When the police found it, pretty much everything inside was missing. For some reason, I had left 6 pairs of shoes in my back seat. Whoever stole my car thought it would be funny to take one shoe from each pair. I now own 6 unmatched shoes and my car smells like sex. FML

#570871
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84128) - you deserved it (5724)

On 03/24/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by proudestmonkey (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got my laptop back after sending it to Dell to repair water damage after a night of partying. Dell returned my computer unrepaired, saying it was unfixable. When I called to ask why they couldn't fix it, they told me it was a biohazard. Someone got drunk and pissed on my laptop. FML

#529692
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52863) - you deserved it (21781)

On 03/22/2009 at 12:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



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