Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

laynepuls

Search for a member

laynepuls

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 530
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

laynepuls's page activity

Visits<b>CountRyan</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 7:04pm<b>Serythvalker</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 4:11am

laynepuls's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of laynepuls's badges

laynepuls's favorite FMLs

Today, I found the only man who hates sex. He's my boyfriend. FML

#6773256
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23966) - you deserved it (3833)

On 12/16/2009 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Unsatisfied (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of two months broke up with me because she said I remind her too much of her first boyfriend and it creeps her out. I've checked with all of her friends and family. I am her first boyfriend. FML

#6616832
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32977) - you deserved it (2792)

On 12/05/2009 at 2:14pm - love - by HellaBomber91 (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I called my wife to tell her I finally found a job after 6 months. A man answered the phone claiming to be the cable guy. We cut our cable off when I was laid off 6 months ago. FML

#6584948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34375) - you deserved it (2139)

On 12/03/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by SatelliteUser (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML

#6532310
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29148) - you deserved it (3849)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sent a Facebook friend request to the guy who had the party I was at last night. I immediately realized, however, that my new profile picture is of me, smiling and holding the trophy I stole from his house. FML

#6312169
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4627) - you deserved it (64193)

On 11/15/2009 at 12:34pm - misc - by Klepto (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my little sister asked what masturbation was. We where having a family dinner with my grandparents. My mother then said, "Why don't you ask your brother? He is a pro." FML

#5528599
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27549) - you deserved it (5928)

On 09/28/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by namhtor (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I told my girlfriend of 9 months that I was ready for marriage and start having kids. She hasn't called or texted me since. FML

#5479094
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15290) - you deserved it (60719)

On 09/26/2009 at 1:34am - love - by bigdawg702 (man) - United States

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend. There were some tents set up out the back so we decided to go in one. When we came out we got weird looks. It turns out my friend had turned on some lights behind the tent, showing a huge silhouette of me giving head. FML

#5102610
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9074) - you deserved it (29972)

On 09/07/2009 at 10:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend. There were some tents set up out the back so we decided to go in one. When we came out we got weird looks. It turns out my friend had turned on some lights behind the tent, showing a huge silhouette of me giving head. FML

#5102610
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9074) - you deserved it (29972)

On 09/07/2009 at 10:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I met some of my boyfriend's family for the first time. His aunt said I was really cute, which made me happy. As we were leaving I said "Your aunt thought I was cute." His reply..."Yeah, well, my aunt's on drugs". FML

#5086042
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42693) - you deserved it (3790)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:33pm - love - by me (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML

#4580514
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58612) - you deserved it (7154)

On 08/16/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

#4331370
818 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26018) - you deserved it (497398)

On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I punched my wife in the face, because she jumped out from behind the bedroom door in the dark. I'm afraid of the dark. I'm 21. FML

#4328474
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24733) - you deserved it (38181)

On 08/06/2009 at 3:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

#4157667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40979) - you deserved it (26496)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

#3967657
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69474) - you deserved it (4241)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: