Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

laurenc

Search for a member

laurenc

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 March 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2249
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

laurenc's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:12pm<b>bentonthegreat</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 3:06am

laurenc's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

laurenc's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML

#14310097
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49636) - you deserved it (6646)

On 12/23/2010 at 11:13am - misc - by unfortunategeek - United Kingdom

Today, I took a shower and right after I fell asleep on my bed wrapped in my towel. I awoke to find my dad slapping me in the face. He thought I had fainted because I'm a diabetic. FML

#13610970
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23065) - you deserved it (4887)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:07am - health - by haleyfml - United States (California)

Today, I found out that Whoopi Goldberg was NOT Oprah Winfrey's stage name. I was then laughed at for ages by my co-workers. FML

#12848184
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6177) - you deserved it (50599)

On 09/01/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by MisterMisinformed - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

#12577034
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36819) - you deserved it (4411)

On 08/17/2010 at 3:10am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26832) - you deserved it (6948)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

#9104990
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38052) - you deserved it (3770)

On 03/15/2010 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my new neighbours came over to introduce themselves. I open the door to see my ex-husband, with a horrified look on his face, and his girlfriend. FML

#9029119
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30967) - you deserved it (1882)

On 03/12/2010 at 7:08pm - love - by abby0019 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21032) - you deserved it (20217)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

#8923957
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19595) - you deserved it (6023)

On 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm - health - by gotitEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my six year old daughter cut out the stomach area of four of my favorite shirts. When I asked her why she had done so she replied, "So that they fit your tummy better, Mommy." FML

#8864405
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26737) - you deserved it (5509)

On 03/06/2010 at 8:05am - kids - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was supposed to go on a date with a guy I really like. My friends convinced me that he was going to stand me up and that I should just stay home to avoid being hurt. He showed up; I didn't. My friends laughed at my gullible nature. FML

#8859695
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10309) - you deserved it (35099)

On 03/06/2010 at 12:14am - love - by mariah_1_11 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

#8851700
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22894) - you deserved it (2412)

On 03/05/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by artsmart1 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I love him. His response? "Is that why you have been so clingy and annoying lately?" FML

#8841470
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27082) - you deserved it (4689)

On 03/05/2010 at 8:06am - love - by jonnah - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my guy, who is a PhD candidate, informed me that it is his goal in life to own every Will Ferrell movie. FML

#8814971
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13699) - you deserved it (10611)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:03am - misc - by J-Ro - United States

Today, my best friend decided she wanted to tell my boyfriend about the time I pissed myself laughing at her house. When she was telling the story I ended up laughing so hard, that I pissed myself again. FML

#8811834
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10370) - you deserved it (21586)

On 03/03/2010 at 10:19pm - misc - by Titi14 - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: