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lauren12983

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lauren12983

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  • Number of visits : 380
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lauren12983's page activity

Visits<b>Nordrag</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 7:17am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:25am<b>ForbiddenDestiny</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 1:59am<b>jojimugo</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 4:33am<b>Istah</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 9:50pm<b>MasqueradePrince</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 10:28pm<b>suoerkewl</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 5:37pm<b>Purrrvana</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 4:02am<b>lina1777</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:33am<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 8:20pm

lauren12983's FML badges

Consolation prize

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of lauren12983's badges

lauren12983's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML

#19196549
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8414) - you deserved it (52719) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/01/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by BadIdea - France

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

#19117009
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29893) - you deserved it (4701)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada

Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML

#18935378
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20548) - you deserved it (4261)

On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

#18044688
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22692) - you deserved it (16791) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/22/2011 at 8:40am - kids - by titoutou222 - France

Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML

#17479569
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38103) - you deserved it (3333)

On 08/15/2011 at 10:45am - love - by single lady - United States (California)

Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#17390197
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34611) - you deserved it (3446)

On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

#16115344
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13956) - you deserved it (42121)

On 05/10/2011 at 6:48am - misc - by Kyle (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I learned, 15 years later, that my puppy from when I was 4, was not taken by Santa because he was in need of a reindeer. My parents took him to the shelter because they thought he was ugly. FML

#15508713
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38171) - you deserved it (4737)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:10am - misc - by leeseyxoxo (woman) - United States (Florida)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37146) - you deserved it (31494)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69742) - you deserved it (6565)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I made out with my friend for the first time. He gave me a hickey that can't be hidden. I'm the president of my church youth group and I have to help give a seminar on keeping your body like a holy temple... Tomorrow. FML

#7900233
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9439) - you deserved it (54863)

On 02/05/2010 at 5:35am - love - by hickey (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took my wife and newborn baby girl home from the hospital. While waiting for the elevator, an elderly couple leaned over, saw our baby, and said, "Look, it's the fat kid that was in the nursery." My baby is six and a half pounds, and my wife hasn't stopped crying. FML

#7296814
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34444) - you deserved it (2373)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:10am - kids - by mickey1928 -

Today, I woke up after taking a sleep pill for the first time. I started in on a number of chores including paying bills when I noticed a new charge on my online credit card bill from 1am. I bought $120 worth of meat from an infomercial. It's non-refundable. I'm vegetarian. FML

#6434122
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21831) - you deserved it (10275)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was falling asleep on my desk, my head on my fist. My elbow slipped off the edge of the desk and I punched myself, leaving a fist mark on my cheek. At school, people think my parents hit me. My parents think I'm getting bullied at school. No one believes the actual story. FML

Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML

#5940105
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39781) - you deserved it (3017)

On 10/22/2009 at 1:53am - love - by uneek_3225 (woman) - United States (Nevada)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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