![[fr]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About lancheloth : Love to play with my kids..
Love to dine out with my wife..
Love to watch nice movie..
Love to read novels (Sci-fi) especially when commuting with public transport..
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9249) - you deserved it (36020)
On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37734) - you deserved it (7269)
On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6027) - you deserved it (34217)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19065) - you deserved it (2229)
On 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm - misc - by alice (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17560) - you deserved it (3604)
On 02/13/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by knockedup (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35493) - you deserved it (4557)
On 02/13/2011 at 4:32am - intimacy - by Eva - Sent from mobile version
Today, I took sexy pictures for my boyfriend. I am at my Aunt's house. I uploaded the pictures and after successfully posting them in a message I deleted them. I accidentally deleted the whole photo library. Now she is taking the computer to Apple tomorrow to recover the "lost" photos. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7319) - you deserved it (37143)
On 02/12/2011 at 8:36pm - misc - by Hailey - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. When I orgasmed, my leg flew out and I accidentally kicked him in the balls. For the next ten minutes, he lay in the fetal position. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18603) - you deserved it (13709)
On 12/11/2010 at 1:00am - intimacy - by caligirl921 - United States
Today, I admitted to my girlfriend that I'd kissed another girl five days before we got together. She told me, "That's OK, I slept with my boss last week." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34095) - you deserved it (5495)
On 12/10/2010 at 2:29am - intimacy - by rob -
Today, I learned that what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas. This includes my one night stand who turned up outside my front door with a suitcase in her hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13263) - you deserved it (27291)
On 12/09/2010 at 7:31am - intimacy - by NeverDrinkingAgain - Canada
Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11667) - you deserved it (38791)
On 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by pst - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49400) - you deserved it (6481)
On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29811) - you deserved it (7444)
On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (377566) - you deserved it (54175)
On 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by gentileman (woman) - United States (Maryland)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
