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Offline (the 10/08/2016 at 7:12pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 July 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5246
  • Number of comments : 437
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About lambda : Hello.

lambda's page activity

Visits<b>Magnit0</b> - the 12/02/2016 at 2:48am<b>_Adog2645</b> - the 11/01/2016 at 4:18pm<b>roshkosch</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 7:16pm<b>Thor1012</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 6:42pm<b>masterreader878</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 1:49pm<b>I_am_TheSixth</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 4:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 12:15pm<b>Mons</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 9:25am<b>DannyDizzle</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 4:56am<b>TheNehman</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 5:26pm<b>TheyCallMeMister</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 1:05pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 11:21am<b>Faby96</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:22pm<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 10:15am<b>BlueAlpaca</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 5:58pm<b>mikkyNZ</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 3:14pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 2:58pm<b>Hooorror</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 6:34pm

Fucked!<b>fishinpink</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:59am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:06am<b>saffy66</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:42pm<b>delichick</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 11:50pm<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 8:18am<b>T_Rev1017</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 11:57pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 10:50am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 6:05pm<b>caseyface1123</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 4:45am<b>FlutterLoud</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 8:04pm<b>ctosc</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 8:44am<b>GamerGirl2014</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 11:08pm<b>junjunbun</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:38pm<b>AndrasteNyx</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 2:06am<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 7:51am<b>TMWhisp</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:34am<b>scottishoatmeal</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:52am<b>399</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:31pm

lambda's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of lambda's badges

lambda's favorite FMLs

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML

by thankskimi / 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

by sucks / 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

by Noname / 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

by Girl123999 / 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

by loser / 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

by Picaresque / 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

by GD / 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

by Mick / 02/20/2009 at 3:29am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

by The Sbeak / 02/13/2009 at 10:54am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

by maxthndr / 02/10/2009 at 12:36am / United States / Work