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Offline (the 10/08/2016 at 7:12pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 July 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5237
  • Number of comments : 437
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About lambda : Hello.

lambda's page activity

Visits<b>Magnit0</b> - the 12/02/2016 at 2:48am<b>_Adog2645</b> - the 11/01/2016 at 4:18pm<b>roshkosch</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 7:16pm<b>Thor1012</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 6:42pm<b>masterreader878</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 1:49pm<b>I_am_TheSixth</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 4:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 12:15pm<b>Mons</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 9:25am<b>DannyDizzle</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 4:56am<b>TheNehman</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 5:26pm<b>TheyCallMeMister</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 1:05pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 11:21am<b>Faby96</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:22pm<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 10:15am<b>BlueAlpaca</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 5:58pm<b>mikkyNZ</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 3:14pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 2:58pm<b>Hooorror</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 6:34pm

Fucked!<b>fishinpink</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:59am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:06am<b>saffy66</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:42pm<b>delichick</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 11:50pm<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 8:18am<b>T_Rev1017</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 11:57pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 10:50am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 6:05pm<b>caseyface1123</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 4:45am<b>FlutterLoud</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 8:04pm<b>ctosc</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 8:44am<b>GamerGirl2014</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 11:08pm<b>junjunbun</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:38pm<b>AndrasteNyx</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 2:06am<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 7:51am<b>TMWhisp</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:34am<b>scottishoatmeal</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:52am<b>399</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:31pm

lambda's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of lambda's badges

lambda's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML

by elizabeth / 11/29/2012 at 3:01am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

by Mak10 / 08/21/2009 at 1:18am / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

by unbelievable208 / 08/05/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

by Rhyno / 05/05/2009 at 11:37am / United States (New York) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

by soontobedivorced / 04/19/2009 at 12:05am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FML

by hannah / 04/14/2009 at 11:21am / United Kingdom (Devon) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love