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lakelsie

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lakelsie

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  • Number of visits : 254
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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lakelsie's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was making salsa and got jalepeno juice all over his mouth. A little bit later, he started going down me. He hadn't washed his mouth. FML

#14074806
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36946) - you deserved it (5158)

On 12/03/2010 at 7:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend left me for my step-sister. He's been cheating on me with her for the past 6 months, and got her pregnant. I also found out that my stomach pains are due to the fact that I'm also pregnant. My family could officially qualify for Jerry Springer. FML

#14068536
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60827) - you deserved it (8954)

On 12/03/2010 at 3:56am - intimacy - by Annonmyus -

Today, I blared my music while I got ready for a night out. Getting really into this one song, I grabbed onto the nearest thing as a makeshift microphone. It happened to be the hot end of my curling iron. FML

#13998989
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8533) - you deserved it (35938)

On 11/27/2010 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Scottish Borders)

Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML

#13998189
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8249) - you deserved it (38781)

On 11/27/2010 at 9:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was making love to my fiancé, his mom walked out of the hotel bathroom and sat in a chair less than two feet away from the bed. She made idle conversation with us for the next 15 minutes. My fiancé was still inside me the entire time. FML

#13990744
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32782) - you deserved it (7048)

On 11/26/2010 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Interrupted - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML

#13961788
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33179) - you deserved it (10905)

On 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Heyy - United States (Washington)

Today, is my daughter's first birthday. Today also marks 1 year and 9 months since I last had sex with my wife. FML

#13961459
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37522) - you deserved it (4347)

On 11/24/2010 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by notgettingany (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, is my daughter's first birthday. Today also marks 1 year and 9 months since I last had sex with my wife. FML

#13961459
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37522) - you deserved it (4347)

On 11/24/2010 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by notgettingany (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML

#13937694
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30327) - you deserved it (9867)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33261) - you deserved it (7589)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML

#13927798
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17599) - you deserved it (48538)

On 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm - intimacy - by sydysyd (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after wondering why I've never met my father, I asked my mom if I was the product of a one night stand. She replied with, "Well, technically he didn't spend the night." FML

#13927499
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28048) - you deserved it (3163)

On 11/21/2010 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in bed. FML

#13867056
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24692) - you deserved it (10204)

On 11/16/2010 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1170378) - you deserved it (125952)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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