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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09laden_swallow09
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8384
  • Number of comments : 2374
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back some of my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

I like to point out stupidity whenever I see it. That's likely why you're here, innit?

Oh, yeah. I almost forgot…
HEIL, SPELLCHECK!

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>missmorggan</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:11pm<b>WattledParsley</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:40pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 1:06pm<b>maisha111</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 9:29am<b>Regimental_Phan</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:55pm<b>Appalappagus</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 9:42pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:45pm<b>thebosslikeaboss</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 2:02pm<b>addisonrose12</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:02am<b>wastingtimeisfun</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 2:23pm<b>Amiiii</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:49pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:12am<b>emeester</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 10:16am<b>Samiepoo</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 4:17pm<b>staaacey</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 2:54am<b>ImBored15</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 10:53pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 7:03pm

Liked!<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:07pm<b>AKlife9999</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:35pm<b>swagmaster696969</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:24pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:17pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 8:50pm<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 6:01pm

laden_swallow09's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

See all of laden_swallow09's badges

laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML

#19479496
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20620) - you deserved it (5235)

On 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by orangechicken (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

#19423040
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13823) - you deserved it (40608)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:27am - intimacy - by anonomous - United States

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

#19423040
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13823) - you deserved it (40608)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:27am - intimacy - by anonomous - United States

Today, I went to McDonalds and ordered a happy meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

#19401139
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39445) - you deserved it (4546)

On 04/03/2012 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to McDonalds and ordered a happy meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

#19401139
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39445) - you deserved it (4546)

On 04/03/2012 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

#19393647
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23199) - you deserved it (2004)

On 04/02/2012 at 4:38am - work - by minimum wage (man) - Canada

Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather by myself. During the five hours I was there, he insisted on sharing the intimate details of his many sexcapades that he has had since World War II. FML

#19375039
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22271) - you deserved it (2616)

On 03/30/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by kawood (woman) - United States

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

#19372815
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11218) - you deserved it (19966)

On 03/29/2012 at 9:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

#19357429
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29004) - you deserved it (23234)

On 03/27/2012 at 1:51pm - kids - by azmom - United States (Arizona)

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

#19347272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27553) - you deserved it (2165)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26934) - you deserved it (6889)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

#19281871
93 comments

Today, I watched Gigli. FML

#19259305
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7891) - you deserved it (25419)

On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 8-year-old niece corrected my spelling via text message. FML

#19227628
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7404) - you deserved it (31543)

On 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30174) - you deserved it (9466)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)



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