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laden_swallow09

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laden_swallow09

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5656
  • Number of comments : 1996
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About laden_swallow09 : They updated the App, so I can read my hate mail! Yay!

I really wish I could take back my FYL or YDI votes, since I tend to miss the button I'm aiming for.

laden_swallow09's page activity

Visits<b>jack_jill05</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Mak007</b> - 21 hours ago<b>theBadGuy37</b> - yesterday at 11:11pm<b>MildewMan</b> - yesterday at 9:35pm<b>kayse</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:13am<b>AwesomeRhone</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:14am<b>isuckwithnames</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:30pm<b>SouthernPride95</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:03am<b>Crossslide69</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:00pm<b>Wingman527</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 1:20pm<b>Flowtastic</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:39am<b>shoopd</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 9:13am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:54am<b>nataliewby</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:56pm<b>sammy981</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:32am<b>DarkRealmGolem</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Megwan05</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 9:46pm<b>emilycardona7</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:03pm

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laden_swallow09's favorite FMLs

Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML

#17731995
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37485) - you deserved it (4486)

On 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm - kids - by Randy - United States (Alabama)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34253) - you deserved it (6050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

#17695562
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33840) - you deserved it (4188)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:52am - love - by I_dislike_Twilight (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I checked the camera I set up to find out who has been stealing my prescription painkillers: my wife, my daughter or my son. Turns out they all are. FML

#17672828
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28678) - you deserved it (2667)

On 09/05/2011 at 5:37pm - health - by oxymorons - United States (Arizona)

Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML

#17640475
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47866) - you deserved it (18389)

On 09/01/2011 at 11:44pm - kids - by nyaahaha - United States

Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML

#17635803
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31747) - you deserved it (5745)

On 09/01/2011 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by djfail - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my wife tried to refill the windshield wiper fluid on her own. However, she poured it where the oil goes. Now the car is having major issues. Last week I lost my job, and I have no idea how much this is going to cost to fix. FML

#17619423
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28522) - you deserved it (3142)

On 08/30/2011 at 5:35am - money - by BadTime (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
676 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30127) - you deserved it (49125)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my house got egged. Why? As a joke, my friend bought me a doormat that says, "A Canadian Lives Here." I'm Canadian. FML

#17547358
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24434) - you deserved it (4571)

On 08/22/2011 at 11:58am - misc - by socialdisease - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Half way through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She won't talk to me. FML

#17525503
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10544) - you deserved it (69275)

On 08/20/2011 at 12:58am - intimacy - by KiDCuSHi - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML

#17431204
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35029) - you deserved it (5201)

On 08/10/2011 at 5:10pm - love - by 6u174r_d00d - United States

Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML

#17424744
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32430) - you deserved it (9045)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:46am - health - by auntoftheyear - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finally noticed that my wife only shaves her bush when she goes on "business trips." FML

#17414090
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54548) - you deserved it (4588)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:59am - intimacy - by ksmith - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40846) - you deserved it (5490)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States



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