Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About laceydove : I'm Lacey. I'm a single mom with one child, Zade! (the little boy with me in my picture.) He will always be my first priority. I enjoy soccer, hockey, badminton and running. I'm a dentist and former model.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML
Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML
Today, I got my period 2 days early, while being interviewed for my dream job. Let's just say that I don't have very high hopes after walking backwards to the exit door and falling down upon colliding with the wall. FML
Friday 18 July 2014