laceydove

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laceydove

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 297
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About laceydove : I'm Lacey. I'm a single mom with one child, Zade! (the little boy with me in my picture.) He will always be my first priority. I enjoy soccer, hockey, badminton and running. I'm a dentist and former model.

laceydove's page activity

Visits<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 3:49pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 5:30am<b>swarm20</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 9:39am<b>olpally</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 9:58pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 5:28pm<b>DJisHere11</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 11:41am<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 8:55pm<b>jordanhraye</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 12:42am<b>bradley97</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 10:41pm

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laceydove's favorite FMLs

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

by heyhijello / 09/09/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML

by anonymous / 09/09/2013 at 4:16pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2013 at 12:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was telling my brother about how my new colleagues and I don't share a sense of humour. He replied, "What, you mean they don't pretend to laugh at your jokes like everybody else?" FML

by laughing-stock / 09/02/2013 at 5:40pm / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Work

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling abnormally self-confident, so I decided to skip putting on any makeup. The first thing my 7-year-old cousin said when she saw me was, "You look like my pet rat!" FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 2:22pm / United States / Kids

Today, my boyfriend admitted to me that the reason he won't have sex with me is because "condoms are too expensive." FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I had to finally accept that I have an eating disorder when I caught myself checking for the nutrition facts and calories on my shampoo. FML

by Jasmine_smilee / 09/02/2013 at 2:47am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I received an email from my professor asking me not to jump ahead on assignments as it makes the other students look bad. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 1:14am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

by NotGabe / 09/01/2013 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got my period 2 days early, while being interviewed for my dream job. Let's just say that I don't have very high hopes after walking backwards to the exit door and falling down upon colliding with the wall. FML

by faulty plumbimg! / 08/31/2013 at 8:14am / India / Health

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

by itsellie27 / 08/30/2013 at 10:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I addressed my district manager as "Dude." FML

by goodbyepromotion / 08/30/2013 at 2:28am / United States (Ohio) / Work