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laaryssa

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laaryssa

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1628
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About laaryssa : thequeenofoverthinking.tumblr.com

laaryssa's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 2:43am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 11:17am<b>CallMeWindSock</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 5:46pm<b>RedSoloCup</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 1:31am<b>bitchimabunnyz33</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 1:34am<b>k_gils</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 9:51am<b>HuntersCreed</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 2:31am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 7:10am<b>Yanchi</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 1:09pm<b>error404n0tf0und</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 11:43am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:45pm<b>DestinysChampion</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 10:03am<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 1:05am<b>JohnTheLad</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 8:37pm<b>kingtice</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 1:29pm<b>Parkour_rocks</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 5:21am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 3:03am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 2:26am

laaryssa's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of laaryssa's badges

laaryssa's favorite FMLs

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

#20862871
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (83660)

On 09/01/2013 at 5:57am - intimacy - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, I, for some reason, was talking to my mom about money. I jokingly said that the reason we're short on cash is because of her internet porn addiction. She replied, with a straight face, "How did you know?" I'm still not sure if she's joking or not. FML

#20862659
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39413) - you deserved it (4843)

On 09/01/2013 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52130) - you deserved it (5374)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40421) - you deserved it (3524)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML

#20861348
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43563) - you deserved it (2706)

On 08/31/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40168) - you deserved it (6684)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, my crew and I were berated by a client for not installing her new hardwood floor on time. We were only halfway through the day, but apparently it should have only taken "like, an hour?" because "The guys on the TV shows do it that fast." FML

#20861177
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40813) - you deserved it (2318)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:44am - work - by smashyonewfloors - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

#20860751
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38750) - you deserved it (6281)

On 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by no life to fuck :/ (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

#20860571
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33522) - you deserved it (2464)

On 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML

#20860538
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42707) - you deserved it (3488)

On 08/30/2013 at 4:31pm - money - by -_- (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked "who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door: "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML

#20860349
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37186) - you deserved it (12591)

On 08/30/2013 at 1:24pm - kids - by thanks, dad... (woman) - Romania (Maramures)

Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML

#20860284
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40183) - you deserved it (2281)

On 08/30/2013 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

#20860215
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40704) - you deserved it (17968)

On 08/30/2013 at 10:44am - health - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out that I'm the creepy uncle of the family. FML

#20860109
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37211) - you deserved it (12677)

On 08/30/2013 at 8:33am - misc - by charlieg9 (man) - United States (New York)



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