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l3g1t

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l3g1t

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  • Number of visits : 680
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l3g1t's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:34pm<b>duckman9</b> - the 08/19/2011 at 4:56pm

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l3g1t's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43021) - you deserved it (3600)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after he gave me the 'let's just be friends' speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

#17080368
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30366) - you deserved it (12298)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:10pm - intimacy - by Anonanon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my extremely paranoid boyfriend called me a whore and threatened to break up with me, all because he had a dream in which I had sex with my ex. I'm still a virgin. FML

#17025215
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43642) - you deserved it (7210)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:41am - intimacy - by wronged - Singapore

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his friends about how great the sex was last night, and how he loves to "make a bitch bend over". We've been dating for 3 years, and haven't made love in several weeks. FML

#17023806
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44208) - you deserved it (6084)

On 07/08/2011 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

#16675127
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32566) - you deserved it (2873)

On 06/15/2011 at 9:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

#13986029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11947) - you deserved it (27535)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55470) - you deserved it (2705)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, in art class, everybody was showing the paintings that we have been working on for weeks. Everyone was cheering and clapping. When mine came up, nobody clapped. FML

#13696419
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24886) - you deserved it (4220)

On 11/03/2010 at 1:00am - misc - by 6boss - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML

#13318955
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70054) - you deserved it (7884)

On 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my 18 year old daughter comes home telling me she has been fired from her job at McDonalds. The reason? They had ICarly happy meal toys and she couldn't resist stealing one. FML

#8838699
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25802) - you deserved it (4812)

On 03/05/2010 at 1:10am - kids - by icarlymom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71596) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML

#5053287
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43823) - you deserved it (3030)

On 09/05/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by HotCurry (man) - United States



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