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kut17

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kut17
  • Town/Country : Utah, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 October 1990 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 874
  • Number of comments : 119
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kut17's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

#19996058
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26163) - you deserved it (4379)

On 08/01/2012 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23085) - you deserved it (936)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a homeless lady decided she needed to change underwear in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned around just in time to see her legs in the air with no undies on. I can never eat salami again. FML

#19988661
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15046) - you deserved it (1374)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by em from Cali - United States (California)

Today, I took a picture of myself seductively eating an apple. I don't know what I'm doing with my life. FML

#19982867
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6308) - you deserved it (15854)

On 07/25/2012 at 2:14am - misc - by Rochelle (woman) - United States

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13556) - you deserved it (3154)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at a park, alone, late at night. Things were getting kind of heavy and he started undressing me, when we heard a loud "Hey!" and a flashlight coming through the bushes. My boyfriend then decided to ditch me, while still holding my shirt and bra. FML

#19935393
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21045) - you deserved it (6094)

On 07/14/2012 at 1:06am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML

#19910434
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4630) - you deserved it (26181) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2012 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - France

Today, I was brushing my teeth when I looked up. There was a huge scorpion dangling on the air vent above my head. I was trapped in the bathroom for over an hour trying to build the courage to run out. FML

#19908614
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15018) - you deserved it (4280)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:47am - animals - by scorpionsurviver - United States

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

#19871781
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4736) - you deserved it (13159)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by rs (woman) - Egypt

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4278) - you deserved it (57289)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, after three months of them dating, I finally met the guy my best friend claims she's in love with. To my horror, she's dating the douchebag that I had a one-night stand with a week ago. FML

#19859958
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26166) - you deserved it (4467)

On 06/28/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by … (woman) - United States

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

#19853920
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28921) - you deserved it (2142)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:05am - love - by tammy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a cop turned his lights and siren on to pull me over. I pulled into a parking lot and got a ticket. It wasn't until the cop pulled away that I realized that I'd pulled into, and interrupted, an on-going funeral visitation. FML

#19847830
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14385) - you deserved it (3045)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

#19820234
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16305) - you deserved it (1978)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29515) - you deserved it (2878)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden



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