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kurbanfan

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kurbanfan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 4 March 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 593
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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kurbanfan's page activity

Visits<b>CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 4:58pm

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kurbanfan's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML

#20458655
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46273) - you deserved it (5624)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:56am - love - by shiney100893 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47204) - you deserved it (5997)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

#20129928
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30827) - you deserved it (10045)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

#20119331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19444) - you deserved it (11070)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

#20027548
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37847) - you deserved it (2194)

On 08/18/2012 at 1:15am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

#19763294
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30919) - you deserved it (4899)

On 06/10/2012 at 12:13am - intimacy - by rachiej8 - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41874) - you deserved it (3827)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, I was denied membership to an all-women's gym. Why? Because "men are not permitted to join". I am and have always been female. FML

#18255210
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35260) - you deserved it (3499)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by insulted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35786) - you deserved it (18835)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

#18087484
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32113) - you deserved it (7941)

On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

#18087484
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32113) - you deserved it (7941)

On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

#18086804
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13584) - you deserved it (34727)

On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States

Today, I was at a shooting range with my father. The target was a creepy poster of a man. My father said, "This one is for your boyfriend." Perfect groin shot. FML

#18057000
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24635) - you deserved it (3901)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:08pm - love - by Mrs. Terrified - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my parents got a call from my English teacher. She told them that I have 14 days of detention because I've been cutting class. I've been there every day, but apparently she never noticed me. FML

#18048344
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34554) - you deserved it (2771)

On 10/22/2011 at 7:16pm - misc - by Bree - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

#18015213
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51007) - you deserved it (8032)

On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)



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