kto123

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Offline (the 08/20/2014 at 2:37pm)

kto123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 7 November 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1141
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kto123's page activity

Visits<b>nissanleaf</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 11:52pm<b>aznmuffin44</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:05pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 10:50am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 7:50pm<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:23pm<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 2:41pm<b>jessal</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 8:39pm<b>VanOBrien</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 1:40pm<b>dmcd_39</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 6:51pm<b>cargaljen</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 9:50pm<b>energizerbunny23</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 5:17am<b>JMichael</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 2:38pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 3:11pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:34pm<b>tulha</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 3:59am<b>tompou6</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 12:04am<b>HeyTherexxx</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 11:41pm<b>pompomkiwi</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 11:10pm

kto123's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of kto123's badges

kto123's favorite FMLs

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

by humdrummitydrum / 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm / United States / Health

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

by Pandamomma / 07/21/2014 at 8:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

by ADanceWithDavos / 07/07/2014 at 11:59am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

by zl5 / 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Work

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, I spent the whole day doing a 500 piece puzzle. The last piece didn't fit. FML

by Puzzlepiece / 06/28/2014 at 10:08am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML

by Pisser / 06/26/2014 at 12:57am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

by failed dad / 06/25/2014 at 8:30am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

by AndrewKeane / 06/09/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend found a movie he loved on Netflix. He was so excited to show it to me and was certain I'd love it. I didn't have the heart to tell him what I really thought of White Chicks. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2014 at 5:27pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

by sothishappened / 05/20/2014 at 5:54am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2014 at 5:07pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Work