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About ktiskool : I'm an Aquarius, I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach and frisky women. And I did not kill anyone. But I know who did. Or rather "what" did. Of course, it can't be for sure, because our investigation was interrupted. But our work in theory, is that were looking for some kind of Vengeful Spirit... SO anyone with any info concerning Casper, the blood thirsty ghost, please contact me.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
Today, I was talking to the guy that has been in love with me for two years. He said "There is a shortage of perfect breasts in the world. It would be a shame to lose yours." He then creepily looked at me and said "It's true." Thanks, Princess Bride, for supplying creepers with material. FML
Today, a neighbour called to say my water tank burst. A colleague followed me home to help, took off his shirt so it wouldn't get wet and climbed through my window to get to the roof. My boyfriend unexpectedly came home as we were emerging from the bedroom. My colleague was still buttoning his shirt up. FML
Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML
Friday 22 May 2015