Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ktiskool

Online | Search for a member

ktiskool

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 29 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 835
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About ktiskool : I'm an Aquarius, I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach and frisky women. And I did not kill anyone. But I know who did. Or rather "what" did. Of course, it can't be for sure, because our investigation was interrupted. But our work in theory, is that were looking for some kind of Vengeful Spirit... SO anyone with any info concerning Casper, the blood thirsty ghost, please contact me.

ktiskool's page activity

Visits<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:17pm<b>josh2014</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 4:28pm<b>whatshisname1066</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:39pm<b>A07</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 10:34am<b>pwnapple99</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 7:43pm<b>arich6210</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:44am<b>miless899</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:12am<b>VisheshSood</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 2:02am<b>LewisHamper</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:59am<b>robbedoes</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:14pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:33am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 2:41pm<b>nreed32</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 3:24pm<b>Feijai</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:12pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 3:48am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:25am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:24am<b>Tundulinski</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 9:53pm

Liked!<b>whatshisname1066</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:39am

ktiskool's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of ktiskool's badges

ktiskool's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

#20989013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49326) - you deserved it (4751)

On 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm - intimacy - by ElephantLover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

#20963971
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25834) - you deserved it (63818)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44477) - you deserved it (17984)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46772) - you deserved it (5318)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

#20846728
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45178) - you deserved it (10610)

On 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML

#20814477
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49923) - you deserved it (3688)

On 08/01/2013 at 12:03am - kids - by ktiskool (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57220) - you deserved it (6782)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44325) - you deserved it (32417) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, my neighbours came to yell at me as they could hear my "shit music" through my window during the afternoon, so I turned it off. They then began to play their definition of "quality music" into the late hours of the night. I was listening to the Beatles. They blasted Nicki Minaj. FML

#20567871
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52331) - you deserved it (4839)

On 03/31/2013 at 2:24am - misc - by BornInTheWrongEra (woman) - United States

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48365) - you deserved it (14419)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

#20481657
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39095) - you deserved it (7881)

On 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34351) - you deserved it (3499)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend had a tantrum because I didn't like Black Sabbath as much as him. Apparently our entire relationship was based on him thinking I did. I've now been labeled "The Queen of Lies." FML

#20108628
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18375) - you deserved it (2690)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, I pulled a neck muscle while head-banging. I wasn't at a concert, and I'm not in a heavy metal band, but I do pretend that I am while I'm in the shower. FML

#19744443
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9620) - you deserved it (20882)

On 06/06/2012 at 2:21pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, during my first man-to-man conversation with my girlfriend's father, he decided to mention the details of lion mating patterns he'd once witnessed. After a lengthy description of the lion's barbed penis, he said, "It also made me feel better about myself that I could last longer than a lion." FML

#19410282
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22830) - you deserved it (2274)

On 04/05/2012 at 1:11am - intimacy - by Lionman (man) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: