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Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4261) - you deserved it (7714)
On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25031) - you deserved it (3292)
On 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by wish.was.single (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19280) - you deserved it (1326)
On 12/13/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19130) - you deserved it (11631)
On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, it's the last day of finals week. Unfortunately the only test I've passed this week is the pregnancy test I took during my lunch break in a Subway bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13635) - you deserved it (29900)
On 12/13/2011 at 12:16am - health - by LogicalMolly - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6887) - you deserved it (848)
On 12/12/2011 at 9:04pm - misc - by unknown - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13370) - you deserved it (1469)
On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last corner piece of the brownies. I ended up with a black eye and and a sprained wrist. He ended up with the brownie and ran away laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18247) - you deserved it (4929)
On 11/17/2011 at 7:50pm - misc - by alliez108 - United States
Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22919) - you deserved it (3034)
On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States
Today, I spent over 20 minutes trying to convince my daughter that the word she was trying to use was "Back-pack" and not "Back-back". I never convinced her. She is 16 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20986) - you deserved it (4178)
On 11/03/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by peonypiney (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20849) - you deserved it (2027)
Today, while in the grocery store my boyfriend said very loudly "Don't make me hit you in public again!" He says things like this every time we are in the grocery store line. The sad part is that it's better than when he says "Are you gonna pay for the stuff you put in your purse?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24844) - you deserved it (6278)
On 10/30/2011 at 4:38am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10078) - you deserved it (1956)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States
Today, I woke up to people in the parking lot screaming "everybody wake up". They've been doing this at 7 every morning since I moved in 3 months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19803) - you deserved it (1900)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:10am - misc - by Tony - United States
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14440) - you deserved it (26378)
On 10/18/2011 at 2:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
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