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krisseyDJ

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krisseyDJ

9Fucked!

krisseyDJkrisseyDJ
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 198
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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krisseyDJ's page activity

Visits<b>martin8337</b> - yesterday at 5:49pm<b>Rocky209</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 11:50pm<b>bre88</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 6:16am<b>MidgeAlot</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:18pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 7:38pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 7:10pm<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:39pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:28pm<b>whyusofat</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 9:19pm<b>AnJ0517</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 6:47am<b>Matheo</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:31pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 1:54pm<b>divinitas</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 12:44pm<b>Raachycat</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 10:13am<b>hasooon</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 11:23pm<b>owlishes</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 3:40pm<b>fifil</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:54pm<b>conman531</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:53pm

Fucked!<b>spockadelic</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 1:38am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 12:28am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 6:03pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:08am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:04am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:30pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:32pm<b>briang959</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:06pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:22pm

krisseyDJ's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of krisseyDJ's badges

krisseyDJ's favorite FMLs

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

#21408378
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30848) - you deserved it (4753)

On 05/11/2015 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
100 comments

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33796) - you deserved it (4522)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 3-year-old broke his glasses, clogged the toilet with Hot Wheel cars, and covered the whole house with Cheerios. All in a matter of roughly 6 minutes while I was putting laundry away. FML

#21393865
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30042) - you deserved it (3338)

On 04/15/2015 at 12:17am - kids - by mommylife (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

#21386342
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38595) - you deserved it (2086)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:43am - health - by usadisvet (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92) - you deserved it (2573)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

#21369959
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35901) - you deserved it (3264)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

#21369958
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105) - you deserved it (13)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

#21369803
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71) - you deserved it (4890)

On 03/07/2015 at 7:14am - animals - by farksh (woman) - Australia

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

#21368964
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43271) - you deserved it (19595)

On 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87) - you deserved it (24)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30441) - you deserved it (4269)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, both my female flatmate and my gay male flatmate have got their boyfriends round. They've both stuck 'Do Not Disturb' signs on their bedroom doors and are both playing music which doesn't quite muffle the sounds of what they're up to. I haven't had a date in over six months. FML

#21335645
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32329) - you deserved it (3717)

On 01/12/2015 at 7:53am - love - by fukinlonely (man) - United Kingdom

Today, after listening to a group of my friends ranting on about how much they love babies and can't wait to have them, I got to witness their looks of horror and disgust as I expressed my desire to not have children. I also happened to be the only girl there. FML

#21335310
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29381) - you deserved it (3045)

On 01/11/2015 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)



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