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krayzie2392's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 08/30/2010 at 2:02am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML
by Eeeek / 08/26/2010 at 5:17pm / Bulgaria (Varna) / Intimacy
by H8TR / 08/26/2010 at 9:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
by JDLAX1924 / 08/05/2010 at 7:24pm / United States / Intimacy
by Our Talisman / 08/01/2010 at 3:41pm / Transportation
Today, the girl that I fancy was sick and I offered to hug her, but she protested saying that she didn't want to get me sick. I told her, "If hugging you gets me sick, then I'll just have to deal with being sick." She gave me the biggest hug she could. I haven't stopped puking since. FML
by TheSickness / 05/28/2010 at 12:15am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
Today, I came back from a week long class trip. My mother took it upon herself to replace my bed sheets and clean my room. Apparently, she found a note under my mattress from my ex-boyfriend. It said "For all you future dudes, Connor was here first!" FML
by FASHlONABLE / 04/05/2010 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/20/2010 at 4:38am / Australia (Victoria) / Geek
by hiii. / 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm / United States (Indiana) / Geek
Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML
by fatlady / 03/07/2010 at 12:41am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
by grounded. / 03/02/2010 at 1:46am / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous
by Dog fart / 02/13/2010 at 11:08am / United States / Animals
Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML
by dire-rear / 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm / Singapore / Health
- Today, I found out how depressed I really am. It's gotten so bad all I want to do is sleep or cry.… Today, I got a job offer in my field of study starting next week and they need to fill it asap but… Today is my birthday. I'm too hung over to move, the sim card in my phone has disappeared, I tipped…