Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

krayzie2392

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

krayzie2392

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1804
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

krayzie2392's page activity

Visits<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 11:32am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 5:13am<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:33pm<b>smbridges</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 3:47pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 9:49am<b>Terri_Dactal</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 12:01am<b>tpm45</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 10:27pm<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 7:26pm<b>Love_sosa</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 1:23am<b>Kautkto</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 8:53pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 9:27pm

krayzie2392's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of krayzie2392's badges

krayzie2392's favorite FMLs

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47034) - you deserved it (4449)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, an old lady hit me with her car. After which she says, "Oh! Not Again!" FML

#15150765
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28634) - you deserved it (2413)

On 02/28/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by roadkill - United States

Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML

#15025975
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37176) - you deserved it (3839)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:06am - work - by sickly -

Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML

#14908871
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29360) - you deserved it (11888)

On 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by maddie! - United States (New York)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69746) - you deserved it (6565)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69746) - you deserved it (6565)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML

#14741730
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36950) - you deserved it (8166)

On 01/28/2011 at 9:25am - kids - by duckthehack (man) - Poland (Wielkopolskie)

Today, at work, whilst on hold to an important client, I said to my co-workers "F*cking hell, this woman sounds high as a kite". I heard a cough on the other end of the phone. All calls are recorded. FML

#14729337
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5969) - you deserved it (34844)

On 01/27/2011 at 6:20am - work - by GHTD (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

#14672798
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17589) - you deserved it (49395)

On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59053) - you deserved it (6113) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33658) - you deserved it (7083)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

#14549373
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (3241)

On 01/11/2011 at 11:04pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mother told me to 'quit having a pity party'. I was just diagnosed with depression. I've lost my boyfriend, my job, my academic standing, and I just got rejected from every graduate school I applied for. And my mother thinks I'm a cry baby. Great. FML

#14394267
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35898) - you deserved it (7411)

On 12/30/2010 at 10:06am - health - by depressednupset (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I don't know anyone in the city where I just moved. I felt really lonely so I picked up my cat to try and cuddle with her. She freaked out and ripped my face apart. She ran then away to go play with the cats outside. Even my cat has more friends than me. FML

#14138227
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27799) - you deserved it (4577)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:33am - love - by owew -

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "my mom is SO awesome." FML

#14128244
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30725) - you deserved it (3527)

On 12/08/2010 at 3:22am - intimacy - by ooblie (woman) - United States (Oregon)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: