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kportal69

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kportal69
  • Town/Country : Connecticut, United states
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 19 June 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1516
  • Number of comments : 116
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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kportal69's favorite FMLs

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

#19434352
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31515) - you deserved it (2906)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

#17742835
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28294) - you deserved it (4867)

On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML

#17738914
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27918) - you deserved it (3698)

On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80456) - you deserved it (11875)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

#17699087
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34879) - you deserved it (4280)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by waj9876 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I caught my husband farting on my wind-chime in an attempt to make it ring. It did. FML

#17668852
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26403) - you deserved it (4071)

On 09/05/2011 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34608) - you deserved it (9282)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117101) - you deserved it (5933)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117101) - you deserved it (5933)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59488) - you deserved it (6228)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

#16722873
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47354) - you deserved it (3174) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/18/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Inconnu - France

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

#16577397
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30987) - you deserved it (6079)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Patrick R - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML

#16313675
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33770) - you deserved it (8313)

On 05/23/2011 at 2:46pm - intimacy - by Jon - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I realized that my pubes are longer than my penis itself. FML

#16181302
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68156) - you deserved it (17318)

On 05/15/2011 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

#16168666
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (102965) - you deserved it (13931)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)



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